So Close, So Far - Intellectual

Kygo is also one of my biggest references in music. I really love the metaphor of love he introduces in Stole The Show and it fitted perfectly on this song’s mood.

This is typical from the teenagers: try to pretend they are OK when they are going through personal problems. When I don’t feel happy at all, I show my most arrogant side. People usually say my ego is quite big, and I don’t think it’s true, but when I’m sad i use that persona as a shield and I can be a real fool. That was a big mistake from my part, because maybe I could have had a chance to recover her if my behaviour had been better.

This not only the song title, but also a lyrical leitmotiv, a kind of mantra that contains the essence of the whole song. I met that girl on the high school because we were classmates, so we were all day together, when we were dating… and when we broke up. That’s the main foundation of the song: the daily cohabitation with someone who once love you but now looks like an strange. Your bodies, your voices, your eyes are so close, but your minds, unfortunately, are so far.

I have to thank my friends for being by my side during that rough time. I am very lucky for having them in my life. Although they were telling me bad things about the girl during the relationship with no sense at all, they were I big help when we broke up.

This is the main idea of the song. We were on the same building, on the same room, sat on nearby chairs, but when we looked to each other it felt like there was a huge distance between us. And it’s very painful to feel that way with someone who has been the love of your life in that time.

The last reference of the song. Andrew Belle’s In My Veins was one of her favorite songs and I think the first one she shared with me. I know music was an important part of her life and sharing her favorite songs with me was a big step for her, so I’ll never forget this song.

This is a reference to Twenty One Pilots' Tear In My Heart. I discovered Twenty One Pilots' songs in that time, and the lyrics of this song helped me to overcome that situation. Nowadays, Twenty One Pilots are my favorite band, I really love their music, their lyrics, everything they represent. I’ve never felt that connection to an artist before. They’re amazing.

On these lines I try to emphasize the feeling that the main line exposes. I really love the ice wall concept, because it marks not only a separation between me and her, but it introduces the feeling of cold which usually follows the passion of love. Same with the absence of love inside her; it just reinforces the feeling of tautness and separation.

We were dating from February 2015 to January 2016, almost one year until she told me she needed time to think, which we both know it was an euphemism. So the first half of 2016 we kept sharing class and we saw each other every single day. I never hid my feelings and I really missed her and kept thinking about her during almost one year although I really tried to forget her. Rough time for me.

I really felt she had changed after we broke up. And it was really bad for me. I started to have doubts about our relationship and her feelings. What if, in last months, she didn’t love me at all and was dating me for pure pity? That was horrible.

This is also a shitty part from a breakup: there’s always one part that turns the page sooner than the other, and it’s really hard to see that your lover recovers her happiness and you keep thinking about her and being unable to carry on. But it’s possible to leave that hole, I promise.

This is a more hidden reference, because I’m the only one who has the information to understand it. On January 2017 I released one of the first tracks I made, L.I.V.I., who was inspired by those feelings I had after the breakup. What nobody knows is that the original title of that song was “Ease Your Heartbreak”.