The Real Slim Shady - Intellectual

Eminem claims that no matter how hateful he is of critics they will still find a way to get him to go to award shows because his controversy leads to popularity.

Em uses a rather backhanded argument for gay marriage, stating that if we find Tom Green humping a dead moose to be hilarious, we can’t just turn around and treat gay marriage as disgusting. Em isn’t your typical gay rights activist, but he has made it clear he’s fine with gay marriage; he treats everyone equally awful.

The line is followed with a disgusted “EWW” in the background from the fictional gay character Ken Kaniff (from Connecticut). In this song and others when Em mentions homosexual things like “a man and another man eloping” it usually follows an ad-lib from Ken Kaniff. Ken gets his own skit on this album, and it was rated number 2 in our list of Most Explicit Sex Scenes in Rap History.

This segment is a reference to the Bloodhound Gang’s novelty hit “The Bad Touch”, the chorus of which goes:

You and me, baby, ain’t nothing but mammals
So let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Blaming the Discovery Channel for kids knowing too much about sex is ridiculous, and Em knows that. He tries to get the point across that there are other media outlets that influence kids besides rap.

Bloodhound Gand referenced a line or two from the Eminem song on the Hefty Fine skit “Strictly for the Tardcore (Skit)”.

During the video, when this line is said Em is in a superhero suit with a plastic butt, forcing a boy band (presumably *NSYNC) to kiss it.

The superhero suit and plastic buttocks are (separate) visual references to the music video of the Bum Bum song.

Eminem is telling either Tom Green or the listener to kiss his ass.

Public Enemy (who Em had referenced before) predated him in their indifference to Grammys. On their 1988 song “Terminator X to the Edge of Panic”, they famously said, “Who gives a fuck about a goddamn Grammy?”

As awards go, it is a pretty crappy one..

I wrote this line because I had recently had a sharkskin floor installed in my home. Hence…Jaws.

It’s mentally stimulating (“head trip”) to listen to Em because his content is so outrageous.

Of course it’s stuff people joke about in private, but Eminem brings these ideas up on multi-platinum albums that the whole world will hear!

As Eminem told Spin:

“If it’s on your mind, say it,” he says of his lyrical philosophy. “If you’re sick enough to think it, then you’re sick enough to say it. I don’t think there’s really a limit to what I would or wouldn’t say—especially if it rhymes good. I’ve got a huge set of balls. I guess, because I say a lot of shit.

Em contrasts his feeling that he is constantly censored on TV with then-MTV star Tom Green’s filthy exploits, including Green’s popular tune “The Bum Bum Song”, and moose humping.

Specifically, “The Bum Bum Song” is about placing your bum on random objects. The song went:

My bum is on the rail, bum is on the rail
[…]
My bum is on the man, bum is on the man
[…]
My bum is on the step, bum is on the step

Here Eminem makes his own version, cleverly referencing “ass-kissing”.

Before Eminem, credible white rappers in the USA had been (and are still) few and far between. Most people didn’t want to fuck with the white boy.

Em refers to the eccentric nature of his Slim Shady alter-ego, taking the common idiom “having a screw loose” to an extreme by saying he likely has “a couple of screws” loose in his head.

Society tends to project the ideology that you should live a normal life, do normal things, work a nine to five job, date one girl, marry her, raise a family etc.

Slim Shady is disregarding this. Telling the free spirits of the world that it’s OK to be different. Be proud of who you are, even if you’re one of God’s unwanted children.

Viagra is used to treat erectile dysfunction (impotence; inability to get or keep an erection) in men

The line implies that at the rate he’s going, Em will be too damaged to get an erection even with pharmaceutical help.

Much of this album, The Marshall Mathers LP, was concerned with the effect of Em’s music on children and his status as a role model. This was also something he dealt with on his first album – as was his obsession with prescription drugs. The CD art on The Slim Shady LP features a personified Vicodin.

Valium is anti-anxiety medication, and a popular drug to use among youth. It is implied that kids use Em’s music to escape their existential dilemmas.

To Em, it’s straight up ridiculous to be surprised that kids are becoming desensitized to adult topics given the rising popularity of vulgarity in music. Even more so, the idea that a child attending school would remain ignorant of such topics is asinine.

Anybody who has attended public school knows that there’s always one kid in the class who knows all the expletives and about sex.

This is what cute girls say when they hear Eminem rapping about rape, incest etc.

Sticky Fingaz said on the track “Remember Me?” that:

My name should be “Can’t-Believe-That-Nigga-Said-That-Shit”."

Eminem similarly uses this idea by suggesting that his name is the phrase highlighted in this explanation.

Shady’s take on the show To Tell The Truth, where the goal is to try and figure out which contestant is what they say they really are. When the answer is revealed at the end, the host would say “Will the real (name) please stand up?”. This is how Em feels in the rap industry, there are just a bunch of other people that want to copy him, but they are just a bunch of imitators.

The wannabe Shady would be listening to Em’s songs “Just Don’t Give a Fuck” or “Still Don’t Give a Fuck” and screaming the lyrics while doing donuts in the parking lot with the windows down.

Eminem was 27 at the time this album came out, but he had still accomplished so much success, seen so much controversy, gone through so many drugs, and acquired so much money that he felt like a much older man. So he predicts that if he keeps this up he is just going to be a burnt out young man in a nursing home who is still as much of a perv as ever.

Jergens is a brand of moisturiser (which sounds a lot like “jerkin”).

This is the thing that separates Em from other “shock value” rappers: he can actually rap. If he wasn’t such an accomplished lyricist people would just view him as the white dude who raps about killing his wife for attention. But since everyone knows he can “shit it” with the best of them, they just can’t stop listening to him since they don’t know what he’ll say next.

Eminem chooses to refer to his style as “shitting it”, even though most rappers generally call it “spitting it”. This implies that his style is out of control and half the time he just says whatever comes into his head, but it is still better than almost everyone else.

The words “shit it” here are accompanied by the sound of someone pooping, just to make the point perfectly clear.

For as successful as his imitators may be in the future, there will be no better rapper than Eminem.

Why Em wouldn’t want to sit next to Britney Spears is beyond me…

His hatred of the music industry’s feel-good mantra is because of the complete contradiction of his strive to be hated. Ironically, he’s thought of being as iconic an entertainer as Britney Spears.

This isn’t the only time he’s trashed Britney……

Talking about sex is taboo in many areas, but it happens perfectly normally in most houses.

“Screws” from the last line refers to both the “screw loose” idiom as well as what your parents are doing in their bedroom.

He may also be hinting a triple entendre of “screws loose“ being the bed screws becoming loose via shagging and the sound effect of a creaking bed about to break.

Eminem used to work at restaurants and such before he made it, so he can definitely relate to the fed-up fast food workers that just want to spit in their customers' food.

Note the double-entendre on spitting, which can also mean to rap. Eminem used to practice rapping while working as a line cook:

“He was a good worker,” Karagiaouris recalls. “But he’d be in the back rapping all the orders, and sometimes I had to tell him to tone it down.” Em demonstrates, freestyling the ingredients of most of the appetizers in his herky-jerky whine. “Music was always the most important thing to him,” Karagiaouris says. “But I never knew if he was any good at it – I listen to Greek music.”
–Rolling Stone, 1999, “Eminem Blows Up”

This plays into the theme of the next few lines – the disgruntled employee using his spite and his love of music to get himself through his soul-killing job.

“Burger King” is censored on the censored version of the song – just like in “The Humpty Dance”!

Years later Em referenced the line on his song “So Far,” from The Marshall Mathers LP sequel.

Went to Burger King, they spit on my onion rings
I think my karma is catching up with me

Will Smith is well known for his clean image and for not cursing in his songs which was due to a message he received from his grandmother as he was 12 years old when he started rapping and his grandmother found his rap book that contained a bunch of cursing in his lyrics and she wrote a note to him that said:

Dear Willard, truly intelligent people do not have to use words like this to express themselves. Please show the world that you’re as smart as we think you are, Love, Gigi.

He mentioned this the pervious year in his song “I’m Comin'”:

An angel, my grandma, told me before she died
Smart folks don’t need to put no cursing in they rhymes

Although he does curse in his and DJ Jazzy Jeff’s 1991 song “You Saw My Blinker” where he ends off each verse by saying:

You saw my blinker, bitch

And he did so again in his 2005 song “Tell Me Why” although him saying the ‘F word’ is bleeped out:

And why the **** can’t love seem to defeat hate?

Eminem disses Will Smith due to the comment Will made at the 1999 MTV Video Music Awards, where after winning the Best Male Video award for the music video of his song “Miami” over the music video of Eminem’s song “My Name Is”, Will said in his acceptance speech:

I never killed nobody in none of my records. I don’t use no profanity in none of my records and I still managed to get up here. Peace.

Eminem felt that Will Smith had dissed rap music, himself, Dr. Dre and anyone else who curses in their songs. Eminem could’ve also taken offence to Will Smith’s line about his grandmother telling him that smart folks don’t need to put cursing in they rhymes in his song “I’m Comin'” and also Will Smith’s line in his song “Freakin' It”:

All you rappers yellin' ‘bout who you put in a hearse, do me a favor write one verse without a curse

Eminem explained this in his MTV special MTV News [Now] Eminem: Hits And Disses where Eminem was asked if he was worried about running into anyone he dissed on this song.

Loder: re you worried about encountering face-to-face Will Smith, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and ‘NSYNC?

Eminem: No. I’m actually looking forward to it. I don’t know if anything is going to happen. First of all, I used to respect Will Smith. [Now] he dissed the whole gender of rap, he dissed gangsta rap music. And that is one of the most influential musics out there. I respect him for saying his opinion, but not everybody is as happy as Will Smith. Not everybody sees life as happy and as positive as he sees it. So if he sees life, uh, you know, about birds and bees and wants to rap about flowers, then let him rap about birds and bees and flowers, but don’t diss nobody else, dude. “Nobody should cuss. If I don’t cuss, nobody should cuss.” I felt like he was taking a stab at me and Dre and anybody who uses profanity on a record to express themselves. If you feel strong enough about something, then you might…put a, you know, a-a little “fuck” before you say exactly what you’re saying. “This fucking tree,” if you feel that. It just depends on how you feel about something. But I do not believe that he doesn’t get home around his family and use no profanity. I don’t believe that nobody cannot swear.

About 5 years later Will Smith responded in his song “Mr. Niceguy”:

Dissed by Eminem but did it bother him? Yup, but he classy
Big Will just get another 20 mill, walk right past E
I’m a nice guy, why y'all harassin' me, huh?

In 1998, Eminem featured on DJ Jazzy Jeff’s, who alongside Will Smith is the duo The Fresh Prince & DJ Jazzy Jeff, song “When To Stand Up” and he even mentions Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff in the song:

Back then, when Will Smith was still the Fresh Prince
And him and Jeff were still best friends
I guess then’s, when I decided to cut class and rap full time

Eminem then mentioned Will Smith in the music video of Dr. Dre’s 1999 song “Forgot About Dre”.

In 2013, DJ Jazzy Jeff shared how he introduced Will Smith and Eminem in 1998. During their meeting, DJ Jazzy Jeff played Eminem’s song Just The Two Of Us which is a twisted version of Will Smith’s song “Just The Two Of Us”, this prompted Will Smith to tell Eminem:

You’re either gonna be the biggest flop in hip-hop, or the biggest thing we’ve ever seen.

DJ Jazzy Jeff went on to say that neither party held any ill will post-VMAs, with Eminem confessing that he “was just sticking up for” his mentor Dr. Dre.

Despite the universal “we’re all mammals” sentiment, Slim Shady doesn’t want you to forget he’s the kind of psychopath who looks at human flesh the way you might look at the makings of a nice fruit salad.

The long “A” sounds in “mammals”, along with repeated first syllables in “cantaloupe” and “cannibal” reinforce the rhythm of these bars. Since the realease of “The Real Slim Shady,” the unlikely pairing of “cantaloupe” and “cannibal” has been borrowed by a number of artists, including Earl Sweatshirt, JUNGLEPUSSY, Wakizashi, Mack Maine and Lord Infamous.

In a 2005 MTV special about Curtain Call, Em explained how the opening line of this chorus came from an idea he had to try to sound like a chainsaw:

He may be talking to the other rappers trying to rap like him, (which he mentions later) by saying, “I’m the real Slim Shady,” implying that the rest of them are just imitating him.

It could also be a reference to how Em got lost in the huge sea of his own fans; at that time, he was popular so much, that teenagers dressed like him (white T- shirts and blue jeans) and dyed their hair blonde. This was emphasized by the video’s depiction of his fans with blonde hair and white T- shirts standing behind him.

Em suggests that the aforementioned feminists really love someone like him, who gives them an excuse to get indignant over his antics but is also attractive to them. This is in keeping with the song’s message that the way artists and media are judged is essentially hypocritical, and entertainment values always trump moral conviction in our culture in the end.

In “White America” he raps:

But Shady’s cute, Shady knew Shady’s dimples would help
Make ladies swoon, baby (ooh, baby!) — look at my sales!

The you-know-what he’s grabbing refers to his habit of grabbing his testicles during performances, while “flip someone the bird” is an idiomatic expression which means giving one the middle finger, another signature gesture of Em.

It’s a reference to the classic hip-hop song “The Return Of The ‘G’” by OutKast.

After his debut LP made him the most controversial character in the music industry, Eminem lets everybody know that Slim Shady made his return.

Since all people have that dark and crazy side, they all should release their inner “Slim Shady” and stand up like the song says.

This is spoken like a principal on a school public address system (PA) or a receptionist paging a doctor.

It gives us the feeling that whoever is speaking deserves attention. This is also reminiscent of a principal calling a troublemaker down to defend his actions or explain his side of the story, which Em proceeds to do throughout the song.

These first lines also serve as a callback to the the intro from his previous (and first) hit single “My Name Is” where he asks for the attention of the class, for one second.

This is a reference to the 2000 VMA’s show and its aftermath. Fred Durst got up on stage with Christina Aguilera to perform “Livin' It Up,” but the rest of Limp Bizkit criticized him for it. To try to get their support back, Durst said that “I did it all for the nookie, man” (implying Christina gave him head). Then Carson Daly came out after and said that he was actually the one that Christina gave head to.

Christina came out and said

He got no nookie. That did not happen, OK? I just want to clear the table right there, and the thing with Carson [Daly] too. Eminem’s whole song did not happen, OK? It just didn’t, but it’s some really crazy stuff that people want to insinuate and people want to say, and it is hurtful.

The Christina rumor she spread about Eminem was on her What a Girl Wants MTV special, where she said she liked his music and thought he was cute, but heard that he was possibly getting back with his wife, then she brought up the theme and lyrics of “‘97 Bonnie and Clyde”, and warning women everywhere about how physical violence in a relationship is wrong. That’s why Eminem was upset with her. Look below for an explanation from Em himself.

Eminem just brought this up to stir shit up and spread rumors about Christina. According to an MTV Interview, Eminem claims he dissed her because she was spreading rumors about him being married to Kim, saying,

“I wasn’t trying to make that as public as I could make it. That was my personal business. It’s like, as far as my personal business, I tell people what I want them to know.”

So Slim decided

“Whatever. That’s cool. But you said something about me, so I’m going to voice some rumors that I heard about you.”

In Em’s book The Way I Am (2008), he claimed that there wasn’t a real beef with Christina and he just did it to get back at the genre of pop music.

Most critics can’t even listen to Em without getting sick due to his perverted lyrics, so it is next to impossible for them to actually tolerate him or show any type of support as fans (stand up and clap) if he were to win.

In Eminem’s autobiography, he says that this line was originally “Half of you faggots can’t even stomach me, let alone stand me.” It was probably censored for being too vulgar.

He’s talking about how sexualized the media is but how repressed it tries to be.

Ironically given the message of these lines, the word “clitoris” was censored in the radio edit of this song.

This is a reference to the old game show To Tell The Truth in which multiple people pretend to be someone interesting. Specifically, it references the show’s end when the host asks “Will the real *name of character* please stand up?”

It could also connect with the previous line, playing on how a principal or office worker will say call someone into his office (particularly someone who is in trouble):
“Will (name of student) please come to the office…”

It’s also mocking the many wiggas who think of themselves as being the next iconic rapper but Eminem is pointing out that only he has actual balls of all them

This line was responded to by his mother on the track “Dear Marshall” which she recorded with ID-X. The song is a letter reaching out to Eminem, where she says:

Will the real Marshall Mathers please stand up
And take responsibility for his actions?

And this might be just a confidence, but the lyrics could also tie to the first verse’s start:

Y'all act like you never seen a white person before

By stating that he has stood up (as he is the real Slim Shady), but they are ignoring him because he’s white.

Ironically, Dre’s carcass began to smell, that’s why I had the sharkskin floor installed. It kills the odor

“Feminist women” would presumably know Eminem from his at-the-time biggest hit, “My Name Is,” to which the ‘chicka-chicka’ vocal scratching sound is a reference. It’s also sarcastic—it’s very unlikely feminist women would love anyone who rapped about killing his ex-wife.

This line is amusingly ill-fated; the reason Em is referencing the Grammys is because at the time of the song’s recording, 1999, Em had been nominated for three Grammy awards. In February 2000, he won two of them, making the situation very “weird” upon this song’s release later in May 2000.

To make things even more awkward, “The Real Slim Shady” and its partner album, The Marshall Mathers LP, both won Grammy awards a year later. He has in total won 15 of these from 43 nominations. They definitely give a damn about him now.

There are so many fake Slims it’s hard to find the real one.

It’s not hard to divine which finger Em is referring to here, but he dropped a few more hints for anyone who might still be confused in “The Way I Am”:

…not the index or pinkie
Or the ring or the thumb, it’s the one you put up
When you don’t give a fuck, when you won’t just put up
With the bullshit they pull, ‘cause they full of shit too

Em made these lines literal with his performance of this song at the 2000 MTV Video Music Awards, creating an army of Shadys:

However, the song meant that people are metaphorically just like him, and would act like him if they thought they could get away with it. He’s kind of willing a potential into reality.

Also a reference to his song “Just Don’t Give a Fuck” from a year before.

At this stage of his career, Em had a particular hatred towards pop acts due to the fact that media outlets would group him in with commercial pop artists because of his skin color and overlapping fan base.

Eminem took pot-shots at nearly everyone on this album, but he made his anti-pop culture stance clear on the song “Marshall Mathers,” where he parodied and called out the big acts of the time—Ricky Martin, LFO, Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, and *NSYNC.

In a retrospective interview with Vulture, Eminem reflected on why he began dissing pop stars in his music:

The reason that I went at pop stars is because people were calling me a pop rapper. […] I’m not this manufactured pop thing and I never was. A way people used to dismiss me was to call me pop. I got mad about that, and I lashed out.

This is just more shit mongering by Slim Shady. He is implying that he has a sex tape with Christina that he could download and show everyone that she’s done him too. Not only that, but when they did it he claims she gave him an STD (venereal disease). So he has pretty much reduced her to an STD-ridden skank that did 3 dudes in under 30 seconds.

He could also be referencing the viruses one can get if they illegally download music on the internet. It was especially risky to do so in the early 2000’s, when this song came out. He could be comparing the computer viruses to the actual viruses she gave him.

He talks about it here:

It takes until the end of the third verse for Em to get to the (relatively) serious thesis of this otherwise comic rap – you may criticize his uncouth, I-don’t-give-a-fuck persona, but there’s a part of you (and everyone else) that is like that as well. It’s a buildup that gets you to pay attention to what comes before.

He’s also trying to will a potential into reality. He’s saying ‘come out. don’t be afraid to be who you really are. get real.’