Opening my eyes and seeing nothing, total darkness
Trying to move, but the walls surround me, no space left
Hard to breathe, inhaling my exhalations, airless
I hear laughter between shovelfuls, from above
Now I realize where I am
Stay calm, avoid claustrophobia
Don’t remember what happened
Why am I prisoner of this shell?
Pushing with all my might for nothing
Yelling with all my might for nothing
Scratching till it bleeds for nothing
Smashing till it hurts for nothing
Is it my reward for a life of misery?
Am I chastised for living this long?
Cannot pray without faith
Anyway, faith won’t save me
Being the cavy, a foolish experience
The scapegoat of human absurdity
The convict of the merciless
The object of a silly jest
Pushing with all my might for nothing
Yelling with all my might for nothing
Scratching till it bleeds for nothing
Smashing till it hurts for nothing
Mourning your burial
Don’t wanna pass out from asphyxia
Living your burial
Better precipitate the end
Mourning your burial
By self-mutilation
Don’t wanna wait till I pass away
I can still hear their laughter
From my final resting place
The air getting thin
I’m lost in darkness
Have to act before exhaustion
How could I commit suicide in here?
Tearing apart my belly skin
Finding comfort in suffering
Touch the wounds with my fingertips
Unrolling my guts, piling them up aside
Biting my wrist, the taste of blood
Extirpating my nerves and veins
Painting the walls of my cage red
With every heartbeat a squirt of blood
Hoping I bleed to death before I start stifling
Now I realized where I was
Stayed calm, avoided claustrophobia
Did not remember what happened
Why was I prisoner of this shell?
I had to act before exhaustion
How did I commit suicide in here?
Tore apart my belly skin
Found comfort in suffering
Touched the wounds with my fingertips
Unrolled my guts, piled them up aside
Bit my wrist, the taste of blood
Extirpated my nerves and veins
Painted the walls of my cage red
With every heartbeat a squirt of blood
I bled to death before I started stifling