[Intro]
The 1970 Grand Final
One the greatest marks ever in the history of VFL football is taken by Mr Alex Jesaulenko
And this is a song about the man he took it over
Mr Graeme 'Jerker' Jenkins
[Verse 1]
The back upon which 'Jezza' jumped and rode into the ground
The humiliated vertebrae that mighty mark crushed down
The pathetic platform from which 'Jezza' leapt into the sky
That ladder to immortality is finally laid down to die
[Chorus]
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
[Verse 2]
Yes, Graeme 'Jerker' Jenkins, the man that stood his ground
That took the pain that gave others fame is six foot underground
Giant jolly 'Jerker' Jenkins, Jesaulenko's dupe
All he got out of that magic mark was a tendency to stoop
[Verse 3]
Did he hear the thundering footsteps on that fateful day?
As he looked up at that Sherrin, did he know he'd have no say?
As 'Jezza' jumped to fame and glory with one almighty leap
And he was left to be forgotten in a crumpled heap
[Chorus]
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
[Verse 4]
And so all you men with small ability and mediocre skill
All those of you who in the race of life are left standing still
All those who must always know others
Who are unquestionably better
The second class, the also-ran, the unsuccessful go-getter
The minor-leaguers, the average markers
The consistent second-raters
The stay-at-homers, the timid loners, the habitual masturbators
The ugly girls, the amputees, the screaming mongoloids
The senile old, the deformed young
The bladders that unwillingly void
The cancer ridden, the AIDS victim, the plastic surgery disaster
The fake bowel, the anguished howl as the psychopath shafts ya
The violated, the child rapist, the jerk-off artists
The intensely hated, the disaster fated, the involuntary fartists
All of you huge race of men, with mind or body dismembered
Never forget the name of the man who will never be remembered
And beware all of you
With hopes of happiness you pathetically nurture
Lest you forget the back upon which 'Jezza' jumped
The giant Graeme 'Jerker'
[Chorus]
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
Is 'Jerker', is 'Jerker', 'Jerker' dead?
Is 'Jerker'...