I've let this play out, I’m use to alone

Scrolling our messages saved in my phone

Where were you at when i needed you most?

You left me to vices, you filled me with hope and then you went ghost

Fuck

I would sit on my porch

Watching it snow

I was lost in my mind

I waited for hope

Nobody answered

No one was home

I can't help but hate this hell that I'm in

For being depressed I’m feeling condemned

And through the next night I'd be at it again

Asking myself, why dont I have friеnds?

I'd be at it again

Drinkin to spin

And we can pretеnd

It won't happen again

I've thrown in the towel

I'm callin it quits

Im losing this battle that's raging within

Every night I was nothing but numb

Chasin the pain, I was lost in the rum

Forever I'm askin am I enough?

Words that are burning the tip of my tongue

The lingering smoke, it blackens my lungs

A constant debate to load up that gun

Sick of just breathin, I’m callin it done

I needed a reason, I couldn’t find one

I know it's our nature to constantly judge

I won’t question why, I won't hold that grudge

Dead on my feet while I'm searching for love

Been fillin the void with addiction and lust

Stretched at my seams, I'm feeling em bust

I can’t let it go, I'm losing my trust

Now it makes sense why people do drugs

Now here we are, we're back at the start

Your soft spoken words are touching my heart

The second you leave, I'm left in the dark

This is the reason I'm falling apart

One minute I'm numb then I'm fallin to pieces

Look in the mirror, you know you're the reason

Heartbreak it shatters, and time, it just freezes

Time passes by one more season deceases

Gotta keep movin to find a new meaning

Follow my heart, but not sure its beating

Feels like I'm trapped, I'm stuck with these demons

I'm questionin what I should even believe in

It's up in the air when i can't find a reason

Keep pushing through, restricting my breathin

Thoughts in my mind, maliciously speakin

Fuck what I'm dealt, im feeling so cheated

I'm feelin so cheated, I'm feelin so damaged

I opened my heart and you took full advantage

Up until now, I'm alone, and I've managed

I dont really care what you think a good plan is

I'm so sick of hearing how hard that you tried

Because of your lies, I'm broken inside

It was every night

We would just fight

The bruising of egos beneath the moonlight

As time moves along, I'm still reading our texts

Saving our photos as "me and an ex"

It's taken some time for these dots to connect

All I can say is that I did my best