[Intro: Akiva Schaffer]

Well, "The Bash" started with myself and José Canseco

Uh, we were matching forearms one day in the clubhouse

And, uh, we decided instead of giving a high five we would bash our forearms together

[Chorus: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer]

Let's bash (Let’s bash)

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let’s bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash on they ass

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash (Let’s bash)

Let’s bash on they ass

[Verse 1: Andy Samberg & Akiva Schaffer]

Uh, just hit a three run ho-ho

But if you wanna high five that's a no-no

I’m heading home, all my homies at home plate

Are waiting on me, so you know I gotta do something great

And that's when the arms go up

Like we about to drink from a cup

'Cause we a bunch of buff dudes just flexin'

Acknowledging our feats via human connection

[Chorus: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer]

Let’s bash (Let's bash), let's monster bash

Hit a tater out the stadi-er for monster cash

Hit a dinger through the fuckin' VIP suite glass

Break your fuckin' arm in half and then sign the cast

[Interlude: Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone]

Get well soon

Love, José

Sorry about your arm, Walt Weiss

It happens

[Verse 2: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer]

When we in Kansas city, we walk out in the parking lot

Then yell, "Fuck the Royals," start swinging and popping off

We beat up their fans 'til the cops say to knock it off

Down half a creatine shake and to top it off

The next day on the bus, got hit with the roid rage

But I played it off

Said I was irritated 'cause of my bootyhole rash

No pain, no gain, motherfucker

[Chorus: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer]

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash (Let's bash)

Let's bash on they ass

[Refrain: Akiva Schaffer]

I left my steroids in El Sobrante

Left my steroids in El Sobrante

Left my steroids in El Sobrante

I got to get 'em, I got-got to get 'em

[Verse 3: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer]

I might be an Athletic but I'm built like a giant

And I'm wearing white socks like an angel that's flyin'

Met a blue jay that's fucking an oriole

You're royally screwed like a marlin, exposed to the oil

That a pirate or a mariner spilled out his tanker

That's a cardinal sin, padre

Man, tell it to the ranger

You feel brave, little cub-cub? Try to sock me

But when I'm seeing red, shit is gonna get rocky

I dodge your fist, beat your blood-red socks soggy

Astrophysicist make you see stars promptly

I'm more hopped up then a brewer that's hyper

Sit Indian-style when I'm yankee on my tiger

I'm staring at a philly with some major league twins

If you didn't know by now, I'm naming baseball teams

[Chorus: Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer, Both]

Let's bash (Let's bash), let's monster bash

Round-tripper make the pitcher feel like donkey ass

Hit a ding-dong-doodle with my bing-bong-bat

We smack a blast then we smash a bash