I think that your hate gives you hard-on

One hand down there while one hand writes

Your column

It's a shame you're made that way

When everyone laughs at what you say

But I am sure we can convert you our way

We have ways to guide you through

There's therapy for pervs like you

Standard psychiatry would do

Ex-pervs testify to it too

But I'm not sure if it works for all your life

Or if the pervert lingers sad and sick inside

I think that your hatred makes you as wet as the sea

I know that your hatred is how you define being free

And although change is a pretty small task

You say it's a big ask, it's too big an ask

I know that it's tough for you

But dykes are here to help you through

With sermons on pleasures for you

And lessons in humanity too

But I'm not sure if it works for all your life

Or if the pervert lingers sad and sick inside

We have ways to guide you through

There's therapy for pervs like you

Standard psychiatry would do

Ex-pervs testify to it too

But I'm not sure if it works for all your life

Or if the pervert lingers sad and sick inside

Lalalalalalalalala it's a big ask

Lalalalalalalalala that's a big ask...