I'm hard to love cause it's hard to lose

Now, the hearts a gut and I go nail and tooth

C'est la vous

Never could get rid of you

Never shoulda been with you

But I loved you

Never will I ever tell the truth now that's the truth

Fuck me blue. What's a guy to do?

You're fucking him too. What am I to you?

I'm stuck in the loop:

Lie to lie to tell it true

Well la di da I've got some news

I'm letting go of you

Now now now

You're like a broken record when you tell me that

I ain't worth a shit there ain't nobody listening

Are you listening? Are you getting this?

Cause I'll give you this you nearly killed me by the end of it

Woulda been my own trigger fit but you'd a been the catalyst

I'm hoping that you're proud of it

I know that I was counterfeit but you know that I've come out of it cause

I left the beast with you standing in the mouth of it

This is me learning to be free now I hope you like the sound of it

I'm hard to love cause it's hard to lose

Now, the hearts a gut and I go nail and tooth

C'est la vous

Never could get rid of you

Never shoulda been with you

But I loved you

I loved you yeah that's hard to do, hard to lose

Like putting a camel through the eye of a noose

I'm fighting the banal desire to use you as a handle to

Get high on abuse

I'm kind of a douche, I'm kind of a fool

I'm kind of just used to writing my rules

I might be a tyrant with his heart in a fist

Fist in a vice grip gripped at his hip

Take ten paces and pull it on the nearest beautiful bitch

I guess you get what you get

They say that joy is love and love is pain

And when you break the love well then you're left with hate

And what is hate? What is it, Nate?

It's a tender thing that tries to fly on broken wings when the air is thin

It's a violent shame that tries to hide its hope with rage because it's scared of it

I'm scared of this, not prepared for this

I left the ground and now I don't know where it is, please tell me where it is

I'm hard to love cause it's hard to lose

Now, the hearts a gut and I go nail and tooth

C'est la vous

Never could get rid of you

Never shoulda been with you

But I loved you

There's a terror to this weightlessness, something heavy in the way it sits

Didn't know my chest could fit so much emptiness

I always wanted pain for the way it makes the Grace make sense

But never prayed for this

I guess that I was made for this

Why else would I be awake for this?

It's hard to say it's just the way it is

But the way it is is better than the way it was

I know because this pain is such

So real to the touch, more real than the love

Too real to give up so I'm giving up

Yeah I'm living on time to get strong

Everything gained, nothing is lost

Who I am not is who I am not

Who I am now is all that I've got

So I'm waking up

I'm holding this cross like it's holding my blood

Yeah I'm waking up I'm laying my arms down to open them up

Please understand I'm giving in and I'm waking up

I'm giving in and

I'm hard to love cause it's hard to lose

Now, the hearts a gut and I go nail and tooth

C'est la vous

Never could get rid of you

Never shoulda been with you

Never could get rid of you

Never shoulda been with you

But I loved you