[Intro]

Hello there, I'm here today to talk about the importance of independent venues

I'm also secretly hoping that by agreeing to talk about the importance of independent venues

I will then be in a position to move away from playing independent venues

[Verse 1]

I'm no good with elocution

To get myself into the institution

So I can win some donkey straw

Get a frame and put it on my fuckin wall

[Chorus]

I wish I had the time

To be a wanker just like you

And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm

Just like you

[Refrain]

Elocution

Elocution

[Chorus]

I wish I had the time

To be a wanker just like you

And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm

Just like you

[Verse 2]

It's a suicide mission

To go online and knock the opposition

But I don't want no donkey straw

Cos I wee'd in the corner near the stable door

And I buzz, career tabs death

Little one liners

Little clever shithouse fivers

In the scope that the hands of the shite have took

Took to the pegs in the coats where the bones hang up

Hey

[Chorus]

I wish I had the time

To be a wanker just like you

And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm

Just like you

[Bridge]

I'm no good with elocution

I'm no good with elocution

[Chorus]

I wish I had the time

To be a wanker just like you

And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm

Just like