[Intro]

Idiot

[Verse 1]

One time I saw my dad

And he was lookin' like the mascot from the Cheetos brand

I'm talkin' 'bout the dude that's basically a cheetah man

He loves spicy corn snacks, and he's been banned from Japan

But just like any good father, he would hold my hand

When I got hurt, we'd take the Cheeto van

The hospital has a lane for special Cheeto fans

And the highway has a lane for special Cheeto vans

The moral of the story is to stop pretending

That your dad isn't actually Steven Williams

You're probably like, "Who the fuck is Steven Williams?"

That's the CEO of Fritos that I Googled for this song

And I tricked you into thinking that I knew who that is

But when I saw his picture, I know who that is

Hе's my father, he's the mothеrfucking Cheeto man

And together we can do it, but not in Japan

[Chorus]

Japan

He's been banned

He's not allowed (He's not allowed)

In Japan anymore

Dad

This is "Dad 3"

And you wouldn't believe

What it's like after three dads

It's the best

[Verse 2]

One time I saw my dad

And he was lookin' like the person who had raised me right

Taught me to be respectful and to never fight

Except that Kellogg's bitch who brags about bein' right

And everything in his world is so fucking great

When he goes to Japan, he gets past the gate

The security line doesn't waste his time

I wish that that father was mine