[Verse 1]

You dopes are all the same

And that's why i'm so ashamed

To be a part of what could be

Called the punk rock community

You take things way too seriously

Or else you take them too lightly

Post messages on AOL

But don't you dare fuck with Janelle

She's everything that you are not

She's not a girl, she is a thought

She's an idea or an ideal that you won't ever get

So go play with your make-believe Internet friends

[Verse 2]

She's on a Greyhound bus

I ate a hairy coconut

I think I might have diverticulitis

Is there too much beer inside us?

Ugly riot girls saying I don't know shit

It hurts to know you care enough to send the very shittiest

So gentlemen and ladies, have a seat

And allow me to repeat

That your stupid online world

And your stupid comments may well be justification for a beating

[Outro]

Where applicable

Not valid in Vermont

Void where prohibited

And shut your fucking mouth

Don't go to Easter Isle

And overpopulate

Destroy God's Spaceship Earth

Dilute! Dilute! OK!