[Chorus]

I am sentimental, really need a mentor

Doctor for my mental

Fell out of my dreams

I'll just be experimental

[Verse 1]

This is me now, fell into the lies

They feed it, feed it, to me everyday

It's just this tormented mind, ever since thirtheen

The virus hit us, thought it would protect me at first

Spending everyday like a blast

Since it was a habit, didn't see it comin'

Then, something changed, instead of feeling safe, I felt the fear chain me

The lightning struck, those nights

Cry myself, in blue all I saw

Messages reading "it's true" and I remember

Suicide thoughts and tears dropping every day, all in my mental

Back then they were the only ones by me, so I couldn't lose

I would just take the abuse and they'll laugh it off

But they didn't know half my pain

And I didn't know true friends

A rain of madness on my mind, they ain't know any sadness I had in me

They'll just say it was all a joke, but it always stuck with me, damn

"I should be off the map" I said

Kept that message close so I would feel the pain all again

It all comes back to me as I succumb to them

Sick in the stomach and head

Trying to find the cure, but, do I really want to relieve the numb?

[Chorus]

I am sentimental, really need a mentor

Doctor for my mental

Fell out of my dreams

I'll just be experimental

Experimental, ex-experi-i-im-m-mental

I am sentimental, really need a mentor

Doctor for my mental

Fell out of my dreams

I'll just be experimental

[Verse 2]

Now I can see it all

I feel everything around me

Just a storm of feelings that never seem to cease

I know I can't reach everybody

Not many will really understand how I truly feel

I wonder how many times the same old song will repeat

Father, forgive us, give them a sight of Your light

No, I don't want to hear no more fireworks

Or shots and screams, cursing each other out in public

I am way too sensitive to live in this world

Ever since day one, an outcast looking for shelter to outlast the weather

Where will I finally end up?

Now I can see and hear how my mind perished over time

No, I can't calm myself down

All my thoughts escape whenever I'm alone or y'all are everywhere

And I just try to, speak my mind

Into this tape, seek and find rhymes and my truth, who'll I trust?

But, many times it just seems like my voice can't be heard clearly

So I'll just let instruments speak for me...

[Break]

I might mess around, lose my mind

I might mess around, lose my mind

Mess around lose my mind

Lose my mind

GOD! Yah!

[Chorus]

I am too sentimental, really need a bullet

Druggy for my mental

Ruins proyected in all of my dreams

I'll just fly away and float somewhere between

Way too sentimental, needa hang my problems

'Scriptions for my mental

The world has fallen upside down

I, I see the light but am too much of a coward

Keep myself asleep, too much weighing on my mental

[Bridge]

Out in the rain, I see the clouds (I'm far)

High in the room, I hear myself (Far from home)

Hanging on trees, stop hearing them (I, I've been)

I'll just lose myself in the pitch darkness (So, so far)

My visions of nightmares that crawl alive (Oh, home, I miss you)

[Verse 3]

Years after, it has been worse than ever

But at least now I realized everybody's perspective

Yeah I be the ghost of all this, they won't miss me (No, oh)

Like they never did, nobody saw all the signs

It has drained my soul away, left me as a husk today

Too busy to help another one, I would but my mind doesn't

Annoy me with those sounds, headaches run my brain

I got the worst ideas on me, hoping to erase my memory from those

Keeping it on the low is what I was born with

All pain, all tainted days, I always had it

Intoxicated by society, the culture plagued by poison of the devil

They all are blinded by riches, something I ain't have

I just need some air, drowning in thoughts

Pardon me for venting, but I don't see this anywhere else

Not with raw emotion, the industry filled with robots

Only God knows my exact thoughts, but I still try to communicate it

Oh, with my heart broken, ain't it funny?

Won't you see all you've done to me?

It has been accumilating over the time

Oh, my! I think I'm a monster

I now am infuriated, my thoughts in the basement

Heartbroken, pieces by pieces gone

Invade my mind and contaminate it

Earth is no more Earth, call it Hell if you want

We are sinners, in need of redemption, that I recognize but

All week I'm weak, I can't do anything

As the clock on the table stops

I can't see outside the blinds

Wasting my time, or maybe not

Since I have something else on my mind

Never on a blank thought

Many times with a blank face, but I can never catch highs

Am I being too pessimistic? Or am I just seeing the truth

Am I able to hold it all together? Maybe not, but I like to believe I do

Never was on the streets, always locked in the house

Really though: sometimes I feel just like

I have everything in me, everything that blocks my path

Hear me, hear ye, from my autism, the fear of the future, crowds, death, blood and pain

My brain splattered on the concrete, even though I did nothing

But, like everyone says, accidents happen

Or, maybe for their own pleasure I die

Back to it now, my ears percieve everything around me

I'm too tall for my own good, since I, can't walk, straight with two feet

Always fall, cry, get up as it all becomes a recent memory engraved on my brain

My depression, the one that controls me, I need angels

And my anxiety, all this and all paired with what I can't recall makes me drown in sobs

Could this be another case of a product of our enviroment? The lost souls that never saw light and always growed old

Is there any beauty in this? I wonder

But, time's running short for myself

Too low, keep my soul

As I just fall to the ground and say

"Good sleep" tonight