[Intro]

You are now listening to—

You are now listening to—

You are now listening to—

QUEEF JERKY

[Verse 1: Dev Lemons]

Yeah, copy-paste it

Yeah, belly button, can I taste it?

In my ball— ball— ball, samic (Yeah, yeah)

Dip my balls in your vomit

Only watch home-grown Simpsons stuff when I—

Only watch HGTV when I got no one to hold

Dan, you can't hurt me

Dan, you can't look at me

I take your mom to the lake

I take your mom to the lake

And then I take off her arms and legs at the lake (Yeah, lake)

Then I dump them in the ground (Yeah, lake)

And then she doesn't make a sound

[Verse 2: nickisnotgreen]

Ayy, ten feet deep in addition to the ground, yeah (Yeah!)

I made her snug, I ain't even heard a sound, yeah (Yeah!)

Andy pitchin' quick when he hits the mound (Yeah!)

It's so loud, it's profound, always sneakin' in the crowd, shit!

[Verse 3: andy king, nickisnotgreen & Both]

Have you ever seen a cat hunt a mouse?

And he's gettin' really happy as he runs around the house

I could play the same game in your bed with your spouse

'Cause when I'm rockin' QUEEF JERKY I get perky and I pounce

Yeah, I'ma chop your balls and I'll nail 'em to the wall, centerpiece

Now you're cryin', I can hear you down the hall on your knees

Yeah, I'ma chop your balls and I'll nail 'em to the wall, centerpiece

Now you're cryin', I can hear you down the hall on your knees (Ha!)

[Verse 4: nickisnotgreen]

Nicky and D come to the scene when I'm shittin' on the beat (Ha!)

Beatin' the meat, spittin' the seed, when I tell you I'm a freak

Would you say that if I kissed you on the face, man?

Would you say that if I bought you some new Ray-Bans?

They voted me most generous in the city

I wish I saw Ellen DeGeneres, so pretty

I wish the GAP finally sold pants that would fit me

I say, "goo-goo ga-ga", baby girl, why don't you sit me?

[Verse 5: hivemind riley, DIGNAN, Dev Lemons & nickisnotgreen]

Dev just pulled up with the chicken noodle popsicle (Yeah)

Whole lot in my cup, yeah, this smoothie is tropical

I took the Wock to Narnia, now I'm smokin' chronicle

(Let's go, Riley!) They root for me like follicle

Imagine Dragons, J.R.R. Tolkien, Imagine Baggins (He did)

Got a huge ass, yeah, I'm draggin' wagon (Big ass)

I just bought the cave that Bin Laden sat in (Goddamn!)

Lord of the Rings, I'm a hoarder of things (Yeah)

I'm gettin' kinda hungry, I might order some wings

I just saw your mom and I told her some things (Yeah)

Next time I saw her, I sold her some things

God damn it, told you Diggy only plays in prime time

R.I.P. Regis, yeah, I think I need a lifeline

Can't respect the law 'cause you know I think that crime's fine

Justin Long, will you please be a guest on HIVEMIND?

[Bridge: sauvignon]

Uh, yeah, gotta blow a load

Grab a tissue from the box, yeah, I might explode

Hot, hot, hot, hot, honor roll

Who shit the bed? I don't know

Uh, yeah, gotta blow a load

Grab a tissue from the box, yeah, I might explode

Hot, hot, hot, hot, honor roll

Who shit the bed? I don't know

[Verse 6: sauvignon]

Yeah, I shit the bed, but I was just playin' though (Facts)

It's just a joke, why you actin' like it's so gross? (Ew)

You probably sittin' on the toilet on your fuckin' phone (Ha-ha-ha-ha)

I innovate, I poop while drivin' on the fuckin' road (That's true)

I'll make it stanky, make it hot like a pizza roll (Nasty)

And when it comes to my shit, I'm the general (Salute)

And your mom, she says she like it, I can't stop it, bro

She a freak for this shit, ain't no pun intended (Ayo, w-was that too far?)

Yeah, it's nasty

But I bet you'd rather that than have her call me daddy (Daddy)

This your mom we talkin' about, perhaps her name is Nancy or Francine

And maybe she likes dancin'

At night, when the sun down, I'ma score a touchdown

She gon' call me over like a waiter when the table needs a bust down

Now I gotta slow down

I really like your mom, but she queefs when I come 'round

It's a real condition, you can WebMD it

They got a lot of photos if you wanna see it (For real?)

And if you take a picture, doctors will ID it (For real?)

Queef confirmed, tables turned

Lessons learned, I guarantee it (Oh!)

[Verse 7: nickisnotgreen & sauvignon]

Yo, I got problems too

Bingin' TiVO with the women who I'm talkin' to

I got handouts for men who got a Glock or two

You got the print on your pants just like a cock, I knew

You got a fade just like a motherfuckin' cockatoo (Oh-ho-ho-ho!)

Bitch!

(QUEEF confirmed!)

[Verse 8: Gabi Belle]

The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round (Skrrt)

Gravy's mom in my sheets goin' round for round

Patty cake, Patty's cake, clappin' around

When her husband's not home she gets dicked down

(Waah!) That's the sound of Mario (Urgh)

Chris Pratt is Mario

Nick smacked Andy's back, give a dog a bone (Waah!)

Stuff you wouldn't expect (No, I wouldn't)

Dream's face reveal on Nintendo Direct

Wait, gotta check

Drake Bell not invited to wedding of Josh Peck

[Verse 9: TRDNG]

QUEEF's back in it, I'm the motherfuckin' side piece

Shittin' and pissin' and cummin', don't fuckin' remind me

Eat some shit for breakfast, yeah, she know she got that ass ate

Waitin' for Nick at Nite, bitch, I stay up late

Got a bad bitch triangle boobies, she look like Lara Croft

Ghosts, ghouls and goblins are some things that I'm scared of

Nick's got the queefs and Andy's got the cheddar

If you say you'll do it better you get hit with a Beretta, man

Mask off, coughin' on a bitch like I'm Dream

Go eat shots out her ass, he in me

Piss is stored in the balls, not the peen

Goin' to Chipotle and you'd better hold the beans

[Verse 10: nickisnotgreen & Joe Biden]

Yar!

Would you even fuck with a lisp? (Ba-ba-ba-bow)

Would you even fuck on a witch? (A-ha-ha-ha)

Can you say you'll kill Joe Biden? (Soda!)

Oughta put your name on the list (Nah)

Oughta slap a freak with some freckles (Freckles)

Bitch, I'm playin' chess, you are checkers

Everyday you think about my pecker (Gah)

I could punch a kid for a week, uh

I would punch my kid for a steed (Huh!)

Got a horse with a mane, I'm a freak (Huh!)

I sell out for the fame, I'm a freak (Huh!)

Throwin' pizza crust out, I'm a freak (Uh!)

I would punch my kid for a steed (Huh!)

Got a horse with a mane, I'm a freak (Huh!)

I sell out for the fame, I'm a freak (Huh!)

Throwin' pizza crust out, I'm a freak (Uh!)

[Interlude: ZAQQ]

Yo! So this ProdbyZAQQ, bro

This song goes out to any of the motherfucker out there

Who's ever been up in the sheets with his girl

And she don't queef all up on your beef

Call that a... QUEEF JERKY

[Verse 11: ZAQQ]

I remember havin' beef with my shawty (Yeah)

But she don't jerk me, she passed me herpes

I wish my girl would not queef all upon me

So now I'ma have to call that QUEEF JERKY

Yeah, I think I don't drop my beat for the table

Six months later, look what the fuck is lurkin'

Jesus Christ, what the— what the fuck is that?

That's my QUEEF JERKY, bruh, don't— lea— don't wanna do that

Everytime I go to fuck my bitch

She gotta lunch with it

Matter of fact, Ice Spice that queef on me

I tried, but she done queefed up in my coffee

But fuck it, bitch, I'ma still take a sip (What the fuck?)

You know I can't spit fast, I'm spittin' this shit slow

Chillin' out here with Nick, if you cringe, then you smoke

Got that Glock on my hip, ain't no need to reload

When I pull out my QUEEF JERKY say that I— oh, no

[Outro: hivemind riley]

Lord of the Rings, I'm a hoarder of things

I'm gettin' kinda hungry, I might order some wings

I just saw your mom and I told her some things

Next time I saw her, I sold her some things

Lord of the Rings, I'm a hoarder of things

I'm gettin' kinda hungry, I might order some wings

I just saw your mom and I told her some things

Next time I saw her, I sold her some things