[Intro]

Okay, here's a

A commercial I wrote for some pay television people

For a little money

"Talking Pay T.V."

I guess they're going to play over in Denver and Milwaukee

[?] Denver

[Verse 1]

Walkin' down to Denver town

I watched the western sun go down

Thought that I would stop a while

Switch around my TV dial

Got some free TV

Only price was a little boredom

[Verse 2]

Well, I'm not sure about my taste

But it seemed that TV land was a waste

I saw thirty westerns, thirty private eyes

Thirty doctors operated before my eyes

None of the operations was successful, though

It's hard to operate with so much violence around

[Verse 3]

Well, every few minutes they'd take a break

For a profound message on a stomach ache

They sold cures for dandruff, milk from the farm

Perfume for my underarms

I've had enough

I'm stickin' to greasy kid stuff

[Verse 4]

Well, the blood and gore was upon the floor

And I couldn't hardly stand no more

So I walked outside to get some air

A theater owner was standing there

Carryin' a picket sign

Said Pay TV was un-American

[Verse 5]

He said "I'm against that Pay TV

I've much rather have people pay me"

A dollar for parking, two for the show

Three for the baby sitter, there you go!

Get to see a wide-screen spectacular

Hercules meets Godzilla

Audience meets nausea

[Verse 6]

Well, Pay TV is fine to see

You get much better quality

Broadway shows, heavyweight fights

First-run movies every night

Viewers of Denver, unite!

You have nothing to lose but commercials

[Verse 7]

Well, people are afraid of something new

They laughed at planes before they flew

You know, you only get just what you buy

So give that Pay TV a try

Remember: families that pay together stay together