[Intro]

Ladies and gentlemen

Boys and girls

Me and my associates are about to change the world

We've got a new idea

A modern panacea

Say goodbye to medicine

Amphibians are in, let's go!

[Chorus]

Hey! Toad doctors!

We are the toad doctors!

Good to be toad doctors!

You will see toad doctors!

Set you free!

[Verse 1]

If you're neck in neck with death

About to take that final breath

Just make a call, we're on the ball

We're on the way and we won't stall

Take a romp and hit the road

By thе swamp, just grab a toad

Then hold him close and tie him 'round your nеck

Then wait a sec, and if you die, that's too bad

We'll bury you and tell your dad

But if you keep your head, don't thank us, thank the toads instead

[Chorus]

This is your final offer

We won't wait any longer

Your head is getting hotter

Not long 'til you're a goner

You only have to holler

For just a couple dollars

This is our last offer

We are the toad doctors

[Verse 2]

Got a cold? Take this toad

Pay us back in liquid gold

Wait a week and then behold

You might live to thirty years old

Throat is clogged? Take a frog

Screwed up eye? Don't be shy

Toad doctors will fight that curse

And pray that we don't make it worse

[Bridge]

They've got a kind of magic that we can not explain

You may think we're jesting but this is not in vain

Science is alive, we have beckoned

As long as you pay us by the second, oh!

[Chorus]

This is your final offer

We won’t wait any longer

And it would be an honor

Unless you live in squalor

You only have to holler

For just a couple dollars

This is our last offer

We are the toad doctors

Hey!