Sometimes I wanna break stuff

From anger, frustration, hate stuffed

Beneath better angels

Giving way to rage that stranglers

Mangled up intentions wrangled

'Til it's backwards Kangol Samuel L

Heat is rising 'cause it's raising hell

Inhibitions fall like paper planes

Paper thin distain disguised

Not a game but I came to win

Guess I wanna control you

Your ups, your downs

To please and console you

Ensure the outcome

But I'm outgunned

Turns out you're not an extension of my vanity

My pride's stung

Huh, guess I wanna control me!

But there's a feeling just beyond my reach

Past my grasp, though I'm grasping

Searching for a handle

Yet acting like vandal

Insecurities

Life's absurdities

Trying to murder these

Insecurities

Life's absurdities

Trying to murder these

Things we'd like to change but powerless to implement

Man in isolation is nigh on insignificant

Mind reach to the sky

But grasp limited to arms width

We wrestle with our nature

Hide the brokenness with varnish

We tarnished in our best times

Most our efforts harmless

So the evil in our midst

Roams practically unharnessed

If honest with our selves

We the ones for whom the bell tolls

And if not grace and mercy

This earth would be a hell-hole

Free-wheeling destruction

Achilles heel of seduction

The world is ours but we're

Apathetic lacking in gumption

The inner man is a Judas

Despite our moral improvements

Turning every page of history

Shocked, "How we could do this?"

Watch a walking contradiction at work

At once the jewel of the earth

And also source of its curse

How to reconcile the inconsolable

Only a new a man, perfect in flesh and soul would do

But tell me who?

But where are you?

Insecurities

Life's absurdities

Trying to murder these

Insecurities

Life's absurdities

Trying to murder these

Fear my words are falling on deaf ears

My heart is hurting to death here

How many who claim to be about the Father’s business

Are really on their own thing

Treating him like a boss does their assistant?

How quick we are to forget that you are with us

Because you’re out of sight we put you out of mind

And we think we can hide ourselves in the process

Foolishness. Selfish

Acting as if my self is just that, mine

But where does my self come from?

Where is it based?

From which Ocean does this seemingly bottomless pond spring?

Emotions, thoughts, instincts all swirl beneath

Far deeper than I can hold my breath to explore

Deeper and darker, deeper and darker

But this vessel is hopeless to remain if unanchored when the tides rise

Tossed and turned to eventually be wreckage

Washed up on some foreign shore

No

I am to live and move and have my being

But earthed in the source and ground of existence Himself

Without this tie, the kite not only does not fly but lies lifeless on the grass

I turn. I turn