[Intro verse]

I feel like the hands of times are holding a gun to my head

And the cancerphobia struggles to get it on it instead ;

I don’t even remember the thing that it was that I said

A couple seconds ago I need to go get up out of bed ;

To my reflection what kind of jerk do you take me for;

Had to swirl a cold coffee in the same cup from the day before

I don’t care anymore, jumping the ship of reason

Prepare to even retire my convoluted ways of speaking ;

[Verse 1]

Feel like I’m going through the motions again

Looking down from the cove, go and make the ocean descend ;

How far does the ocean extend?

Big breath, holding it in

Only Olympic gold when I swim ;

Praying for a shark bite

Or something in the back of my mind

Anything to get it off off it all closing in ;

I feel like a sardine

In a monologue sound like (?)

So I stay along with the pen ;

I told myself I wasn’t even gonna do this anymore

Before I figure out what it’s even all for in the end;

I mean, is it like I’m not even supposed to pretend, that I’m not close to the end, and act like I don’t comprehend?

Im a shell of my former self, just a ghost in the wind

Composed in my skin, stretch marks from holding it in

Reliving the same moment again

Quotes from the field notes that I wrote from when I had to go to the bends

[Chorus]

I don’t even know what I enjoy anymore

I been racking my brain (?) to get annoyed to the core

I been stuck in a constant cycle of destroy and restore

I’m over everything and so I had to avoid and ignore

The mental fatigue, of intrigue, the spoils of war

Hands shaking like when I was drinking poison before

It’s making sense, more and more

I can see taking form from the shore

The vanishing point that I been looking for

[Verse 2]

I don't even know what I'm doing

So much in my environmental distractions

My thoughts lacking any congruence

Self-governance failure

Slow steady and (?)

A change of perspective can get a loose (?) to it

(Incomplete lyrics)