This is the tale of Robin Hood

Kind and fair, brave and good

This is the tale of Robin Hood

How the guy got shafted

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

Robbing from the rich, giving to the good

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

Happy ever after

But driving down from Nottingham, here comes Dooh Nibor

His motto is 'Protection' and his motto is 'Screw the poor'

Dooh Nibor, Dooh Nibor, serve the rich, screw the poor

Don't let the bastard grind you down

He drags you to the granary out among the cranes

At the end of the runway underneath the planes

In a big black suit that looks a little strange

With the gold crash hat in the rays of the sun

With the visor black and the baseball bat and the .....

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

You're not dead yet, it's just some blood

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

Get back and show the bastard!

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

Bound and gagged in the nude

Robin Hood, in the boot

Of an Opel Corsa

As the pylons glisten in the sun of Dooh Nibor

The world below him listens, there's no place for you here any more

We pull our golden helmets on and turn to face the sun

Don't let the bastards grind you down

He's got you cuffed at the reservoir up above the dam

With a gag and a blindfold shitting in your pants

Clambering on scaffolding, stumbling on planks

Look out, Robin! (Too late!)

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

Breathing through a rubber tube

Sherwood Forest is your club

Sherwood Forest for the cup

Robin Hood, Robin Hood

In a wheelchair buying food

Paralysed but feeling good

Mentally retarded

Pull your golden helmet on and take a golden ride

Kidney dialysis colostomy bag by your side

Robin Hood, Robin Hood, breathing through your rubber tube

Don't let the bastards grind you down!

Don't let the bastards grind you down!