Released on March 26, 2001
22K Views
[MAX, spoken]
Don't you see Bloom, darling Bloom, glorious Bloom, it's so simple:
Step One! We find the worst play ever written
Step Two! We hire the worst director in town
Step Three! I raise two million dollars
[LEO, spoken]
Two?
[MAX, spoken]
Yes! One for me, one for you. There's a lot of little old ladies out there
Step Four! We hire the worst actors in New York and open on Broadway!
And before you can say step five, we close on Broadway, take our two million and go to Rio!
[LEO, spoken]
Rio?! Nah, that'll never work...
[MAX, spoken]
Oh ye of little faith!
(sung)
What did Lewis say to Clark when everything looked bleak?
What did Sir Edmund say to Tenzing as they struggled toward Everest peak?
What did Washington say to his troops as they crossed the Delaware?
I'm sure you're well aware!
[LEO, spoken]
What'd they say?
[MAX]
We can do it
We can do it
We can do it, me and you
We can do it
We can do it
We can make our dreams come true
Everything you've ever wanted, is just waiting to be had
Beautiful girls wearing nothing but pearls
Caressing you, undressing you and driving you mad
We can do it
We can do it
This is not the time to shirk!
We can do it
You won't rue it
Say goodbye to petty clerk
Hi Producer
Yes, Producer!
I mean you, sir, go berserk!
We can do it
We can do it
And I know it's gonna work!
Whaddaya say, Bloom?
[LEO]
What do I say? Finally a chance to be a Broadway producer
What do I say? Finally a chance to make my dreams come true, sir
What do I say?
What do I say?
Here's what I say to you, sir!
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it, that's not me
I'm a loser
I'm a coward
I'm a chicken, don't you see?
When it comes to wooing women
There's a few things that I lack
Beautiful girls, wearing nothing but pearls
Chasing me, embracing me, I'd have an attack!
[MAX, spoken]
Why you miserable, cowardly wretched little caterpillar!
Don't you ever want to become a butterfly?
Don't you want to spread your wings and flap your way to glory?
(both sung simultaneously)
[MAX]
We can do it
We can do it
We can grab that holy grail
We can do it
We can do it
Drink champagne, not ginger ale!
Come on Leo, Can't you see-o...
[LEO]
Mr. Bialystock
Please stop this song. You've got me wrong
I'll say "so long"
I'm not as strong a person as you think
Mr. Bialystock
Please take a look, I'm not a crook
I'm just a schnook
The bottom line is that I stink
I can't do it
[LEO]
You see Rio, I see jail!
[MAX(LEO)]
We can do it
(I can't do it)
We can do it
(I cannot, cannot, cannot, cannot do it)
[LEO]
'Cause I know, it's gonna fail
[MAX]
We can do it
I know -
[MAX(LEO)]
It('s) cannot (gonna) fail