[Verse 1]

Well, the dog act got drunk again last night

The king and queen of the waltz clog team had another fight

The king was careless with his tango grip

Nearly lost his queen in a dip

Yeah, she righted herself

Straightened out her slip and kicked him in the shin

Miss Billy Begonia thinks she's hit the big time

She wants a thick red rug from the dressing room door

To the front-line of the footlights

She's got a sky blue swan's down powder puff

And a corset to keep her spirits up

Yeah, she don't sweat

She sours and melts like ice cream in the sun

She'll be out of a job at the end of this three-week run

[Chorus]

We're having fun out here on Panic Beach

All the vaudeville bums are here out on Panic Beach

I hear them talk about the palace but it's so far out of reach

So I'll do my time, then say goodbye to Panic Beach, yeah

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

[Verse 2]

The visionary theatric strikes a juggler's seesaw tune

And the dying swan pirouettes and fawns

By the light of the street lamp moon

When my trunk is filled with taffeta

Those big time hacks won't laugh at us

When my taps are made of silver, I could make the kiddies thrill for just one buck and wing, ha

Yeah, I will nail them to my heel and the panic choir sings

[Chorus]

Here comes a lucky little thing to Panic Beach

Yeah, you know we got to teach him how to sing while we're stuck on Panic Beach

Hey, we hear them say, doesn't seem so outta reach

So I'll do my time, then say goodbye to Panic Beach, yeah

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 3]

Well, the landlord gets a free show every Saturday at six

Sometimes on a Sunday

All dependin' on whatever kinda mood he's in

I keep his glass filled up with sherry

And sing him all his favorite songs

If a tear comes to his eye he may let a month go by

Before he takes away my key

Oh, that sherry starts to taste real good to me

[Chorus]

Hey mama, look at me on Panic Beach

I may be hungry but my rent is free up on Panic Beach

Now I can almost see the palace no longer out of reach

So I'll do my time, then say goodbye to Panic Beach, yeah

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, I, I, I

[Outro]

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, I-I, yeah

Oh, good', good', good', good', good', good', oh-yeah

Baby, let me go

I may be hungry but my rent is free, yeah

Hey, hey, everything, mama

Mama, mama, mama, look at me

Oh, mama, mama, mama, look at me, yeah

But I'm stuck, but when I'm stuck up here

Ooh, but I'm stuck up here, okay

Ooh, okay, okay, okay, baby

Oh, yeah