Hello, I am your friend, I give you air to breathe

I'm oh so pretty, oh so pretty with a lady bug on my leaves

It's okay to look at me in fact I enjoy it

Just please don't touch or pick me up

I'd appreciate it if you'd avoid me

My cousins give you food to eat and shade to stay cool in

Hey man get the hell away, aww what the fuck? I'm burnin'

Don't smoke me

Back in the day it was O.P.P. now you're down with THC

Hey muthafucka take a tip from me, find some asbsestos, it's the best thing to breathe

Don't smoke me

Fuck you man, what'd I ever do to you?

You think I like getting rolled up and burned too?

Think again, dipshit, you're so fuckin wrong

I've got my own home and it's not in your bong

You think smokin' me is just what you need

But once and for all I'm not a fuckin weed

Stop copping out, face your problems like a man

Your life's one big failure burning in your hand

I didn't spend time growing just to be burned

I hope you'll go to hell and then it's your turn

I can't believe just how pathetic you are, son

I'd tell you to go suck my dick if I had one

Don't smoke me