[Verse 1]

Now Fred, he was precocious; he liked to poke and pry

And stick his nose in everything that moved

His parents often warned him, "Be careful what you try"

And his incautious conduct disapproved

But if it had a button, a lever, or a knob

Just like a magnet, it attracted Fred

I wish I had a nickel, a farthing, or a bob

For every time his dear old mother said

[Chorus 1]

"Don't push that button! Jesus, Fred

Don't push that button! Use your head

You don't know what it's hooked to, you don't know what it does

You start that foolin' 'round and we'll be worse off than we was

Don't push that button! Jesus, Fred

Don't push that button! Use your head

Your luck won't last forever, as everybody knows

I just hope I'm not with you when it goes"

[Verse 2]

Fred's tightwad uncle Henry woke up with pain one day

An urgent triple bypass was performed

The family went to visit, and there old Henry lay

With medical technology adorned

But Mom went to the bathroom, the doctor cornered Dad

And rich old Uncle Henry slipped away

They found the will last evening, and everyone is glad

There wasn't anybody there to say

[Chorus 1]

"Don't push that button! Jesus, Fred

Don't push that button! Use your head

You don't know what it's hooked to, you don't know what it does

You start that foolin' 'round and we'll be worse off than we was

Don't push that button! Jesus, Fred

Don't push that button! Use your head

Your luck won't last forever, as everybody knows

I just hope I'm not with you when it goes"

[Verse 3]

It landed in the backyard, all saucer-shaped and green

And opened up and dropped its gangway down

Our Fred sneaked up inside it, astonished at the scene

For buttons covered everything around

There's pink and green and blue ones, of every shape and kind

Including this gigantic one, bright red

But once young Fred had pushed it, he nearly lost his mind

For this is what the flying saucer said

[Bridge]

Specimen collection cycle complete. Retrieving auto-return programming

Liftoff countdown initiated at liftoff minus two seconds, one, zero, whoosh

[Verse 4]

It's been a week or two now since last we heard from Fred

And no one else has seen the boy around

We dropped in Friday morning to shake him out of bed

But not a trace of Freddy could be found

He wasn't in the backyard, although he left a mark

This spot out back where all the grass is dead

While some think it was foul play, and others just a lark

I really think we've seen the last of Fred

[Chorus 2]

He pushed a button; that's our Fred

He pushed a button, lost his head

He didn't read instructions or find out what it did

He jabbed his finger down, and that's why Freddy's so well hid

He pushed a button! Oh my, no! He pushed a button! 'Fraid it's so

His luck, it must have run out; he's in over his head

I doubt that we'll see any more of Fred

I doubt that we'll see any more of Fred