Some days I feel fine

Other days I feel the worst

I’m always second best

I never come in first

Rejection breaks my soul

To where I feel my hope is dying

Why would I fight back

When I’m so tired of trying?

Why should I start to try

What would I leave behind?

A half ass life

That I half ass designed?

People come and go

They’re known for moving on

No one ever stays

They won’t miss me when I’m gone

Today’s a Wednesday morning

I’m already getting drunk

I’ll keep my statement short and sweet

My ship already sunk

Sailing hope has left the dock

It’s getting lost at sea

It's getting swept away

By a not so gentle breeze

The ocean can be peaceful

But it’s also full of harm

I’ve hidden all my hurt

With some ink inside my arm

I covered up scars

Wounds I couldn’t bear to see

But what I really can’t face

Is a mirror showing me

It’s a delicate dance I do between happy and sad

Life is going great, but in a flash it then goes bad

Everyone’s been saying “Krystal, you have changed”

I’m holding onto memories and keeping them in frames

The light and the dark is flashing like a strobe

My pain is where I’m comfortable, it’s always been my home

Tiptoe from the dark and light, don’t know another way

The black or in the white, I think that I’m just grey

Left in the wilderness

The trees are tall and green

I look into the pond

And the reflection’s so mean

My thoughts are the wolves

They’ll always be around

I’m no longer safe

Have to go back underground

Is this all just in my head

Or has my frame started to crack?

I feel as though if everyone

Is just turning their backs

On me, on everything we have

I feel it in my soul

A year has passed me by

And all these issues still hold

Sometimes I’m on an island

It's a land of broken dreams

I cling to all my failures

Now that no one’s on my team

I let my mind go

In all directions I don’t choose

Even though I’m in the grey

I’m soaking in my blues

I could call S.O.S

And tell them that I'm lost

But I don’t think that I can afford

Everything that it would cost

This island has no white walls

But the night paints the sky black

I’m hungry for affection

It’s been the main thing I lack

The trees begin to sway

And it’s almost like a waltz

The waves are crashing at my feet

The sting of all the salt

On battle scars, on open wounds

Can’t wash away my past

The tides are rising, I sink in

The air is fading fast

It’s a delicate dance I do between happy and sad

Life is going great, but in a flash it then goes bad

Everyone’s been saying “Krystal, you have changed”

I’m holding onto memories and keeping them in frames

The light and the dark is flashing like a strobe

My pain is where I’m comfortable, it’s always been my home

Tiptoe from the dark and light, don’t know another way

The black or in the white, I think that I’m just grey

Left in the wilderness

The trees are tall and green

I look into the pond

And the reflection’s so mean

My thoughts are the wolves

They’ll always be around

I’m no longer safe

Have to go back underground

All the color leaves my eyes

I’m sinking into grey

It might not be the worst

But that's not much to say

Hope will breed the misery

And fantasy kills chance

Both devils on my shoulders

I’m so tired of this dance

Maybe I should just be alone

And live without the colors

Spare my friends and family

And any future lovers

They never deserved this

And I don’t deserve them

I’m gonna lose them anyway

It’s a matter of when

Quiet feeling quieter

The chaos might subside

Maybe this means I’m getting closer

Maybe I could die

A break would be nice

But life is not that fair

I have to put the work in

Have to try my best to care

I write these words on paper

And I’m shocked what’s in the ink

Like what I wrote moments ago

Is that how I can think?

The chance and possibility

That maybe I could cope

That’s why the grey’s not black

Cuz there’s a little bit of hope