[Verse 1: Kool A.D.]

I'm the best white rapper, call me Paul Barman

I got bars man, Tarzan, Don Cheadle, Mission to Mars, man

Most of y'all sweet like marzipan

Boobie say my pipes be the heat like cars man

If the booty ripe, I might eat the whole jar

Can, bowl, pot, basket whatever

Rap game Pol Pot, caskets leather material

Most of these rap cats smell like posterior

Their roster's inferior

Me, I'm a monster, delirious

Half rasta, half pasta serious

Hoffa couldn't find how lost I get often

Get off it, I'm a vet, I wet possum and jet

I get off 'em and on 'em again, awesome

Honor my friends flossing

Respect the fly fashion, look at my

One ugly rugby, I took it and washed it

And kicked it to my cousin in, he was like, "Gracias, primo"

Kool A.D., amigo

La musica de amaze ocho ocho

Pero no ocho cinco, blinko blinko

I'm so, um, ridic-u-lico

Pause, shout to Mike Finito

Neato, Suave, Rico

White girl, Nico

Psychosomatic, addict insane

In my own nation like the Vatican, mayne

John Wayne on the saddle again, rattling chains

I never battled for fame or ratted

Or tattled or got mad at the game

I never batted an eye, I batted the same

Average to keep me consistently drafted, and that's it

And still managed to drop a few classics

Old school, new classes

Old view, new glasses

I told you, I do magic like David Blaine

Stand stationary, remain the same

You minor, I'm Major Payne, baby, I'm Damon Wayans

Please take me out on the fader, mayne

But wait -- no no, not yet

[Verse 2: Lakutis]

I'm in this smokey detective room

Bars full of light through the blinds

Look into his eyes

Mouth got the moth on it

Meat with the sauce on it

Jewel in the eyesocket

Picture of the kid

And your girl gold heart locket

Ice cold flow buss it, it's nothin' (it's nothin')

How am I doin' this!?

Damn sho' the gold ring, Mrs. thing ring ring

Telephone, sorry it's the President

Hold up I gotta take this, yes hello Mr. President Obama

Ho love the aesthetic but she hate the rap music

She be sayin' Lak-yoo-tis -- that's not how you say it, bitch

Check me, I'm the Don Juan, garçon

More Pellegrino, please

See me with the pedigree, marijuana medical

Don't go past two hundred

Keep it one hundred, keep it ugly funky with me

Call the bitch chunky, hit me crispy chicky

Microphone flew out the hand and knock a ho out

Damn

[Interlude: Dallas Penn]

This is one of them filthy cyphers

One of them dirty drawer cyphers

Where you didn't bathe for a few days

Not because you can't, but because you didn't want to

[Verse 3: DVS]

Rip your diplomas, cancel your Time Warner

This the last thing you need to know for the time bein'

Fly being, eyes on the prize, obvious mind readin'

Defy reasoning, mind of science is not reachin' 'em

I'm in the mirror in the picture in your Instagram

Candyman, hook in my hand, not what you think I am

Live with a plan, stand and deliver

You livin' in a van down by the river, that's unfortunate

I'm sure you thought of this, steak and a bone

Eatin' the cartilage, stay in your home, you don't want all of this

Don't even bank on the phone, remain anonymous

I'm In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida, you and Eve are up out this bitch

Told you not to eat them apples you asshole

Now fast forward a couple of months, you in a bad zone

I'm still the man though, funny how things happen

Misfits step on the planet and then the track go

[Verse 4: Meyhem Lauren]

Yo, lap dances from strippers with lap bands

Come through spots and we dap hands -- what up, Dan?

I'm just chilling, trying to live

Keep the contraband out of the crib, know what I'm saying?

Rocking fly sweats, sneakers that's Gore-Tex

We come through, bitches want raw sex and beef patties

Let em carry ball bags, call em street caddies

Bump and grind on the gas line; peace, Sandy

Stay dipped, flipping like I keep my feet handy

..And that's where I ran out of clever things to say, like

I'm trying to think of something cute to say right now but

I'm about to just let the song end

You already know that we in here

Except for when we not, then we out there