I'm afraid of the monster under my bed

"It’s not there, though" my daddy said

So, I look -- oh, shit, I'm dead!

I'm afraid of the scratching coming from there

Daddy says, "No need to be scared"

But I look -- oh, shit, it’s a bear!

I'm afraid of the thing that whispers my name

"Nothing's there, though" Daddy claims

So, I look -- oh, shit, I've been maimed!

I'm afraid of the eyes out there in the dark

"Don't be scared!", oh, my daddy barks

So, I look -- oh, shit, it's a shark!