[BECKY, spoken]

Jenna, time to pee on a stick!

[JENNA, spoken]

I don't wanna know. 

[BECKY]

C'mon honey, you've waited long enough

[BECKY & DAWN]

Get to it and do it

[JENNA, spoken]

Okay girls, enough!

[BECKY & DAWN]

You know what we mean

[DAWN]

I hope you drank enough this mornin'

[BECKY]

C'mon sweetie, it's better to know

We'll be right here with you so

[DAWN]

It's no or it's yes

But either way you gotta take the test

[BECKY]

A squat and a squeeze

A prayer and a please

It's nothin'

[DAWN]

A stick and a line

[JENNA]

Just one of 'em - if I'm lucky

[BECKY & DAWN]

A pot and a piss

Here we go sis

An' we'll keep our focus on

[JENNA, BECKY, & DAWN]

The negative!

[BECKY, spoken]

Read the instructions

[DAWN, spoken]

Se puede saber la duración de la-

[BECKY, spoken]

English!

[DAWN, spoken]

Do not insert the test stick into your vagina. 

[BECKY, spoken]

Wooow. Thank you, Dawn. 

[JENNA]

How'd I ever get myself in this mess?

One drunk night an' that stupid red dress

[DAWN, spoken]

Aw, I love that red dress! The way it sparkles, it looks like a ice-skating outfit!

[BECKY, spoken]

Ugh, stay with us, Dawn!

[DAWN]

Maybe his machinery is broken somehow?

What if his boys don't swim, I mean, wow!

(spoken)

Miraculous luck!

[BECKY, spoken]

Damn, miraculous!

(sung)

To get away with an unprotected fu-!

[JENNA]

Funny how one night

Can ruin your whole life

[BECKY & DAWN]

Don't go there yet

We don't know what the test says

[JENNA]

I'm already panicked!

[BECKY, spoken]

Just calm down, god damn it!

[DAWN]

Maybe it'll all be fine

[BECKY & DAWN]

Maybe there'll be just one line

[JENNA, BECKY, & DAWN]

Come on, negative!

[DAWN, spoken]

I thought you don't sleep with your husband much anymore?

[JENNA, spoken]

Well, I - (sigh) he got me drunk. I do stupid things when I drink, like — sleep with my husband. 

[BECKY, spoken]

Honey, we've all made that mistake!

[JENNA, BECKY, & DAWN]

Focus on the negative!

[BECKY]

This will all be alright

[DAWN]

It was only one night

[JENNA]

Someone

Send me a sign

[BECKY & DAWN]

One line

[JENNA, BECKY, & DAWN]

One line

[BECKY & DAWN]

That means the test is ready

This is it...

[JENNA, spoken]

...shit