Pr - Intellectual

[Refrain]

I'm the last judgment I've been runnin' from

I'm the last in the room when everybody's gone home

I'm the last one left when all's said and done

And I'd rather have to satisfy anybody else but myself

Don't even know what I deserve

I was in this truck stop bathroom, tryna measure my worth

Is it my finest highlights and some lessons I've learned

Or the people who'll see me as the reason they hurt

I crashed at your apartment, I dashed over the bridge

And I lashed out at my mother for askin' me to live

And I blacked out in my madness, and that I can't forgive

And I cashed out my amends, but still, I don't think I'm it

And that's a motherfucker, oh, that's a narcissist

Like perfect is the only way worth it to exist

Like learning isn't valued more than palatable sin

So I tally up the bad values 'till I'm valid to win

I'm flounderin' like a flounder, I'm gaspin', let me in

I'm trash, but that's just that and I'm askin' for a chance

And I grabbed the medication, I grasp at new ideas

And I practice meditation, I'd bask in how it feels, but I'm scared

I'm the last judgment I've been runnin' from

I'm the last in the room when everybody's gone home

I'm the last one left when all's said and done

And I'd rather have to satisfy anybody else but myself

Don't want you knowin' my inheritance

My brokenness is fuckin' embarrassin', so fuckin' arrogant

Shoulda left my cerebellum in Maryland

It's unbearable, I'm spiralin', watchin' violent criminals

In psychiatry, and makin' unfair comparisons

Maybe fair enough, I'm like a Ferris wheel

Roundabout myself, get scared of feeling, made of scary stuff

Folded in like origami swans and herons 'n' them

I'm paper-thin, a paper cut would be perilous

I'm hangin' on, a barrel over the falls

Raisin' hellfire on myself for my failures

And if I don't forgive, then I don't forget at all

If I forget, I'm livin' in a fog

If I forget, then I'm cast out to the dunes

But if you're the ones that I love, then I'll see you very soon

My name's JC Foster, I'm takin' it to the moon, uh