[Intro]

My man Jarv, uh, he's nice

Dude's like crazy, like AH! He's nuts!

[Verse 1: Jarv]

Jump, jive, gettin’ jiggy in the basement

Jarv jaws give a true feeling of jubilation

July to June, son juggling jewel statements

Julie the june bug and jugular juice Jason

Are jamming out, Nate J can account

Jenna Jameson and Janet J. oughta joust

I jerry-rig a jock-jammed J to the jowls

And I chug a jug of Jack and I chase it with stout

Now Jarv’s automatically awesome

I’m dropping anvils from Andover Vermont down to Austin

Assembling an amazing array of anthrax and arsenic

The art of advanced arson

Annihilating, Anyone as I’m annoyed

At all of y’all androgynous androids

Anthropomorphic assimilations

Aren’t anywhere annexed or adjacent

To rhetoric really rad and hella rich

Robust rats rip raps irrelevant

Religious republicans reticent

Ready-writhe in the reticle of my Remington

Relish in raw, repugnant refuse

Rock-roll rhymes rough, rugged and rude

Revamp ramps and rev rally race rides

Reluctantly raggamuffs cut loose and vibe

Divide viles of vast verses

Vamp various vile-verified versions

Vex and vent; veer void, violent vipers

Veni, vidi, vici; venemous verbalizer

Vigilance; vilify villages

Increase the volume, I’ll get villanous

And vicious like Invader Zim or Darth Vader

The way Vin Vega’s veins been-

[Bridge: Jarv]

Straight vitriol spinning on a victrola

On the track I’m sicker than Ebola

Post up and get roasted, son

J A to the R V’s dope as fuck

It’s straight vitriol spinning on a victrola

Shit’s sick, man, I thought I told ya

Show up and get roasted son

J A to the R V’s dope as fuck

J! A! R! V!

Jarv, J! A! R! V!

J! A! R! V!

I fuck with Jarv!

J! A! R! V!

Jarv's number one!

J! A! R! V!

G-G-G-Good job, Jarv!

[Verse 2: Jarv]

It’s the jump off; jawbreaker jump ball

Juvenile Jarv in a jukebox junkyard

Jerry can judo journal-jacking junkies

Judas jumped Jesus, juxed him just cause he was judgy

All of y’all are actors affluent in Aspen

Actively adopting Alabama accents

Asinine adverts and adolescent apathy

Y’all amateur anesthesiologists aren’t attracting me

Rack ‘em, rack, rack ‘em, rackball

I’m in a Range Rover reciting some riveting raps, y’all

Roll out red rugs, roll reefer and resin

Relax with the resident relic

Relish and rep his-Very vast vocabulary

Vapid, vital and vulgar

Vibing in your vixen’s Volvo

Visualizing the vulva

Then voila; vanish in a vaginal vortex

The verbally vascular vernacular vet

[Outro: Jarv]

Will claim victory

Spinning on a victrola

I’m a king, please get me a mimosa

I roll out and don’t show no bucks

Cause J A to the R V’s broke as fuck

I claim victory spinning on a victrola

When I was young I used to drink mad soda

But now it’s H20 because I’m so grown up, what

My name is Jarv and y’all can hold my nuts