{*sounds of snoring and an alarm clock going off for 25 seconds*}

Ohhhhh FUCK!!!

[Jake Lefco]

I woke up panicked, blind and frantic

God damnit, must have hit the snooze again

I must have overdone the booze again

Fuck this shit, that's the kind of mood I'm in

Jake-o, motivate, wake up, put your clothes on

Do it quick 'fore you doze off

The pillow is so soft, and the blanket's so warm

Hold on - one second

One minute more, then I'll be finished

F'real, just give me ten minutes (motherfucker)

Mmm-hmm, that's nice

Eyes are blinkin, body is sinkin

Deeper in the mattress and not even thinkin

Face in the pillowcase, Rip Van Winkin

{*snoring and alarm clock*}

[Jake Lefco]

FUCK!! Can't be late for wake

FUCK I already am, it's already 10

Rolled over so fast hit the floor with my chin

Wrapped in the quilt like a pork dumpling

If I'm late again they won't try to rub it in

Boss told me next time don't bother comin in

But I gotta, so I got up on my feet

Kicked off the sheets, threw on the tee, my black slacks

Dress slacks and buttondown, buggin now

Huffin and puffin now, runnin down stairs

Sweatin out Bud Light, smellin like beer

Hairline matted down, lookin like Cher's

I don't even care, gotta get there

Unshaven unsure, lookin out the front door

I'm gone, ran out with dumb force

Tripped on the stairs and off the front porch

Now I'm out for the count on the lawn like I sunbathed

Broke down like a Hyundai

When I came to, took more than one take

Saw the newspaper came, it was Sunday

Oh shit! It was Sunday!

Thank God it was Sunday!

Ahhh, I'm goin back to sleep

{*snoring*}

[Outro]

Hi, I'm Jake Lefco

And uhh, when I'm not here working hard on these rap records

Uhh, during the day I'm selling nipple caps

Uhh, to horses and other animals to cap their nipples

Uhh, yeah, mm-hmm, great