Twisted - Intellectual

I'm getting tired of feeling the way that I have been

Always hear the same voice inside my head calling me a has been

Wish I had a stronger choice but I know a vice will only ever stick to sin

Typical shit and I'm tryna vent

But it never works unless I grip the pen

Now I see that I'm right here

Unaware of where my life tear

Say you love me but I don't care

Cause that feeling something that we don't share

Twisted view when I see a mirror

Fluctuating every day I veer

Advocating that I fall to fear

But that's shit advicе that I'll stall to hear

Sick and tired of the rollеrcoaster

Struggle by until the day is over

Witness pain until I meet Jehova

This a different league and I ain't talkin MOBA

Depression make me idolize a holsta

Push it down but it'll take me over

Hard for anyone to know me closer

And the solitude has never won me closure

Maybe it's me who's inflicting the wound

Impatient need a cure soon

Fantasies of a pure tomb

But this jealousy got a bad fume

One face, I learn from the moon

Mental season pushin monsoon

But it's needed now if I wanna bloom

Please, get me outta this

Motherfucka I'm just tryna switch

Bring me down to a place of bliss

With a loving touch and a healing stitch

Never much when I was a kid

That's the root now for all the hunger shift

Struggle more to embrace the mist

And the more I fight then the more I drift

Got a phone call from my brudda told me

Miss you man now hit me back homie

Just us needa bag homie

Money itching tryna get it on me

If I trip then I know you got me

Drowning slow in this life tsunami

And the reason why I'm still here beyond me

Bitch I'm staying distant even with those in my vicinity

Don't speak with that affinity

Won't break and I ain't finicky

It's been up and down with futility

Catch myself in duplicity

And this feeling really ain't new to me

Frequent cycle with efficiency

Why the fuck can't I just break free