[Intro]

I did, I went to the market

And, umm… I bought, I bought 5 pounds of oranges

Uh, what I- what I did is I made a orange… juice out of it

And then, uh… I was walking downstairs and I saw a monster!

It was eight feet tall; it was enormous!

And I tried to kick it, and I kicked it, uh…

Right… right in its asshole

Aw yeah

Get ya birth control, muthafuckas

[Verses]

Dramatically improving the way that I deal with your kids

Finicky fuss, budgeting, shoving the plate aside, bossing me around

Saying the only thing that you're eating this evening

Is chocolate pudding and apple juice

It isn't happening kids, your parents pay me to produce

Culinary mindfucks like this raspberry stuff, goose

So please voluntarily saddle up the seat

You got a bathtub battle coming up soon, so you better eat

I remember my gummy worm days

I would gaze with my eyes glazed over at an illustrated page

Becoming a babysitter, persuasive communicator

Putting the children's finger paintings up on the refrigerator

Frog and toad evenings, popsicle stick projects

Peanut butter clay, and other kindergarten concepts

Nightsticks and stones might break Stallone

But Lance Henriksen is harder than dinosaur bones

So take the sting from a scorpion and the treasure from hidden tower

Tora tora, aurora borealis and lava showers

Schoolyard, jump rope, singin jamboree jingles

Blue-collar, hard labor, pressure-washing somebody's shingles

Mixing and mingling at equestrian clubs

Shrubbery, urinator burning over his unrequited love

Power glove, sour grapes, seamless as a super cape

Mr. Pennsylvania throwing garbage cans at your fire escape

It's everything you ever wanted and more

Angelic, incredible, undercover band on tour

[Chorus x3]

The light from the sun reaches earth in eight minutes

Build a rap-metal rocket

Put Grand Buffet in it

Set the target at heaven

Let the rocket blast

May our death come quick

When we smash into God's ass