Aimless was a glimpse of my life

Sporadic thoughts and emotions splatted and blotted on these pages

Every single line had the potential to form their own song

I had so much to convey but I didn′t where to start

Please don't ask if I′m okay, I'm clearly not

I don't open up to people that′s just not who I am

I′m a man

So most people just won't even care

Instead I keep my emotions hostage

Bottle them up inside and run around like there′s nothing going wrong

I'm in my own lane where no one can see me

Hidden behind the bushes sitting in my car

Staring out the window while the rain trickles down

I′m really lonely, I'm wondering if I′m the only one

Walking around saying the same things

Wishing for change, locked in a cage

Hoping that I can be happy for once

Or maybe proud of myself for longer than two seconds

That's when reality kicks in

Which throws me across no man's land

Back to the depressing mind fields which I′ve spent my whole life

Aimlessly trudging through the pitfalls and trenches

Just to wonder if any of it is even worth it anymore

I never let people see the dark side of me

It′s when I'm alone

Its super scary to see, even to me

But as soon as there′s people around

I switch it up and now your seeing the fake side of me

So I put on a façade and keep my cards close to my chest

Erect a barricade to block them from entering

I need to deflect them away from my emotions

Cause even I won't let myself in to see them

They hide away from everyone they′re scared of the light

They have nowhere to run, they'll certainly put up a fight

They′ll definitely bite, Maybe only enough to stun

So they can fade from the spotlight and go back to the shadows

Only sign of them now is the dust that arose

And now I'm sitting here alone, dazed and blown

The air thrown out my lungs so I get up and groan

Confused at why I even came here in the first place

That's when I start to spiral

Wondering what my purpose is in life

Feeling like I′m wasting every second of it

Everything I do, I find a way to critique

It would be pretty comical to say my outlook is bleak

And all I know is that I need to let my emotions go

Ignore them, forget them, torment them

And I′m never gonna let them gain control

Cause when they do

They mount a siege on my brain

Scale the walls

And add to my pain

Splatter the ceiling with bloodstains

The skies raining with the bodies of the slain

Slay in vain and burn everything to the ground

As they take over my body

And claim my mind, blame my mind

Cause I'm the one that let them in, fed them well

And now I′m wondering why I fell

I go to hell

For all the feelings I have killed

At this point it's basically just a form of genocide

An internal struggle erupting inside of me

And I know it′s lame

I remember when they came

I thought I was strong enough to tame them

But they all burst into flames

They all picked up a gun

And then started firing rounds

Sprayed scene then decided to flee

So now there's no emotions left inside of me

Will I always sit here paralysed on the brink of lifelessness?

Soullessly trudging through every day like it′s never-ending

Questioning if I'm ever gonna feel something real ever again

Or continue on numbing the pain

Until I'm walking with a cane

Spending my dying breath to worry about all I regret

You′ll probably forget all about me by then

But would anyone actually realise I′m dead

Cause its all in my head

And no one really ever cared enough

To even dare try to understand everything going on up in there

Now we're at the end

′Cause the pressure will build up

The fuse will light and no one's safe

The emotions surround me

They′re overwhelming

Welcome to the battlefield which I hid away from myself

And let it stay concealed until I started feeling so empty

That's when I began wondering where they had gone

They seemed to have withdrawn

So I was very confused, refused to believe it

Until I went on a journey to search for them

Once again, Wondering aimlessly until I stumbled across them

Here I am, Battered and bruised

The sight before me has scarred me for life

Because what I revealed was an army of lies

Stretching further than my eye could see

Kinda like a lord of the rings battle scene

Why am I feeling so numb?

Why doesn′t anything feel real?

Why am I feeling so numb?

Why doesn't anything feel real?

Is this shock?

Is this denial?

I need to cry

I need to release my emotions 'cause they′re trapped inside of me

I′m spiralling past the point of no return

Falling, into the Abyss

I'm spiralling past the point of no return

Drifting, watching the world go by

Drifting, watching my life go by

Till I′m stuck here

Watching my life run away from me

That's why I′m always so distant

Yeah I'm spiralling

(Spiralling)