Andre spent three years all alone
In his car, his only home
It was a Lincoln Continental
And Andre with his massive writing skills
Obtained a memoir deal
For several hundred thousand dollars
Now he lives in a house
With his sister and doubts
That he ever will write again
His new prime directive is to be a detective
Solving mysteries no one can
And who am I to say what is right or okay
For a perfectly stand-up man like Andre
Andre, Andre
[x4]
Andre, even though you're 4 foot 10
You are a giant among men
But not the giant people usually think of
And one day you will solve the perfect crime
The satisfaction will be sublime
You'll get a write-up in the paper
And now over the scanner in a desperate manner
A cry of shock and despair
There's an officer down, and he can't be found
He just vanished in thin air
And Archibald Aspen, he starts to askin'
"Who will save the day? Where's Andre?"
Andre, Andre
[x4]
His name is Andre