[Verse 1]

Moanin' and a heavin' on a hot sticky can

I'm cravin' chocolate Ex-Lax and my G.E. fan

I'm taggin' on the wall how I got in this jam

And said, "M.S.G., money, margaritas, and my man"

Storin' up my supper coffee and my snacks

The shit's pilin' up; kinda feels like a cramp

Instant relief is what I need to ease

The mega colon that's inside of me

Nightmares of my dinner at the China doll

Thinkin' 'bout my wardrobe gonna get at the mall

TV Guide, Cosmo, I'm runnin' out of mags

And I just smoked a pack of my cool fags

Finger in my hole gettin' into the dig

There's cum stains on my panties and jizz in my wig

My man calls me cherry, think's I'm uptight

But I'm gonna blow him off 'cuz I'm dynamite

[Chorus 1]

She's Sandra H., not Sandra D

And my lady Yvonne standin' next to me

She said, "Holy shit," I said, "Yes, that is it"

Now our mega colon is a big, big hit

Mega colon

[Break]

[Verse 2]

Thinkin' 'bout my man it really makes me sick

The shit got soft, steamy, slick

It came out in a blast that was really foul

Forget the white cloud, I need the Bounty towel

I need a new life, I got to reform

I can't take my strife in this thunderstorm

I got to be strong, got to be brave

Don't wanna bear the title "Ms. Toilet Slave"

[Chorus 2]

I'm Sandra H. not Sandra D

With my lady Yvonne standin' next to me

We are fly white girls movin' in New York City

Our rhymes aren't tough but our faces are pretty

We were hangin' out in bars lookin' for a groom

When we met each other in the ladies room

She said, "Holy shit," I said, "Yes that is it"

Now mega colon is a big big hit

Mega colon

[Outro]

Fly white girls movin' in New York City

Fly white girls movin' in New York City

Fly white girls movin' in New York City

Fly white girls movin' in New York City

Fly white girls movin' in New York City