[VERSE]

Fighting for a feeling

Even if it's fleeting

Numb out of my mind

I’m bleeding staring at the ceiling

Life is unappealing

Words are static to me

Sentences on TVs it’s an empty

Channel nothing’s happening

On mute it’s still as damaging

I hate the fact that hate exists

I hate that I’m a pessimist

Don’t wanna keep on feeling this

Don’t wanna stay so ima dip

Don’t wanna work so ima quit

Don’t have a heart that you can fix

Don’t wanna keep this cycle up

Was happy once but never since

There’ll be a time when I won’t wake up any day now

Thinking of some ways to end it whenever it rains out

Lightning hits my skin I close my eyes and pull the shades down

Gripping on the switch and thinking I should start a blackout

Went through every type of group and always stayed a cast out

People that have been with me are only talking smack now

Always switching how I’m feeling as a matter fact, how

The fuck do I stay sane when my own head feels like a guesthouse

I hate the way the I’ve become but I ain’t changing nothing

I burn the bridges that I build cause I’m afraid of judgement

Sometimes I feel like I don’t love you cause I’m always numb, and

There’s no more satisfaction with all of the skin I’m cutting

I used to like the rain until it started causing floods

I used to love my dad but then he started doing drugs

I used to wonder what it might be like to be a dove

But now I know that flying ain’t as fun when you’re a bug

I have respect for the life I was given

But I can’t help but think something is missing

Days unfulfilled finding joy is a mission

Sick in the mind don’t rely on prescriptions

So many issues don’t need an addition

Trying my best not to add an addiction

Blaming myself for my own damn afflictions

Survival of the fittest but the rich get that position

So much second-guessing sick of constantly confessing

Done with all these sessions haven’t learned my fucking lesson

I’m just looking for affection only happy for a second

Buried by depression filled with unresolved aggression

Starting up some stupid habits

Hurt your feelings call it savage

Using violence like your rabid

Chasing karats like a rabbit

Eating garbage like a maggot

Try to sleep it never happens

Seeing everything as malice

Wonderland without an Alice

Drinking poison taste of melon

Making weapons like a felon

Grab a snake I want the venom

Battle like it’s Armageddon

Not believing in a heaven

‘Cause we’re already in hell

I wonder can you tell

That I’m never doing well

Constantly reminded that the world’s a bad place

Evil on the news they shove the horrors in our face

Even if you don’t experience it you deserve a taste

Of humanity’s mistakes, yeah fuck the human race