[Verse 1]

Selecting my payment type

While I’m mid flight

I’m higher than a kite

Flying first class, gonna take a bite

(this food is ass)

Gonna buy a sprite

But cash is tight

The time is right

The lights are bright

I’m feeling extra polite

Downloading these terabytes

Fuck, I forgot to select my payment type

Outta cash, gotta use my credit card

Really caught me off guard

Buying a tub of lard

Got called a retard

While I was on the yard

Granny hit me up, gotta send a postcard

Got in trouble with the coastguard

Feeling kinda jarred

My yard is looking hella charred

Got a saint bernard

Put it all on my credit card

[INSTRUMENTAL BREAK]

Got kicked in the nard

In my backyard

Driving on the boulevard

Going to a scrapyard

Getting a shitbox car

Shit looks bizarre

Came with a jar

Now I got a new scar

And I’m smoking a cigar

They call me a star

Cause I go far

Putting my hand in the cookie jar

Decided to work at the bar

Feeling like a superstar

Breaking in your house using this crowbar

Might fuck around and steal your electric guitar

Or maybe your spacebar

And drive off in your car

Accidentally hit a reservoir

[Verse 2]

That shit cost a fortune to fix

Put it all on my credit card

Now I’m feeling up to par

Eating a big ass chocolate bar

And shitting in a mason jar

(TWO GIRLS ONE CUP)

Looked up at the sky, shit thats a red dwarf star

Gonna move to the capital of Qatar

Hit the president with a metal bar

Might have to perform CPR

DJ Buttpiss owns a steel bar

He drives a very fancy car

His dogs a porn star

He can be seen from afar

Watching aladdin, shout out Jafar

He refilling his cum jar

Pouring tons of tar

In his new scottland yard

He insta selling to the bazaar

(FUCK SELL OFFERS)

[Outro]

Pirated WinRAR

Left my car door ajar

Call that shit subpar

I’m a man named Dharr

(man)

Maties YARRRR

My dick is charred

This goes hard