I know that we're different but I can't relate

I don't think I would make it inside of the gates

With the best of intentions you thought you could help

I just can't stare at a headstone and talk to myself

As if it were somebody else

But hell I could gloss over memories

And get lost in a melody

I wrote to cope with a past that was dead to me

I'd deal with the devil if I could forget

And be ignorant rather than cynical

Innocent rather than miserablе

Difficult tragic decisions were dissonant static and rhythms

Conditionеd to quietly die

Feel like I’m fading I’m dying away

When I let go

Write something meaningful I wouldn’t say

On my headstone

Go through the rituals make them believe

That I’ll be remembered forever

And try to pretend I was better

In words that if I wasn’t dead, you would never recite

She heard the news and she fell to the floor

I still wonder why I was hesitant for

The end of a life that's a hell of a thought

There’s solace inside of a burial plot

I walked through the gates

Expressionless look on my face

Kept my composure in place

Faked an embrace

Tried to pretend in your faith

I’d deal with the devil to stay

Ignorant rather than cynical

Innocent rather than miserable

Difficult tragic decisions were dissonant static and rhythms

Conditioned to quietly die

Hold it together

My heart turns cold with the weather

Feels like October Forever

I think I’m part of it now