[PHIL]

So, ya wanna be a hero, kid? Well, whoop-de-do!

I have been around the block before with blockheads just like you

Each and every one a disappointment

Pain, ey, for which there ain't no ointment

So much for excuses

Though a kid of Zeus is

Asking me to jump into the fray

My answer is two words

[PHIL, spoken]

Okay

You win

Oh gods

Oy vay

[PHIL]

I'd given up hope that someone would come along

A fellow who'd ring the bell for once, not the gong

The kind who wins trophies

Won't settle for low fees

At least semi-pro fees

But no, I get the greenhorn

I've been out to pasture, pal, my ambition gone

Content to spend lazy days and to graze my lawn

But you need an advisor

A satyr, but wiser

A good merchandiser

And whoa, there goes my ulcer!

I'm down to one last hope, and I hope it's you

Though, kid, you're not exactly a dream come true

I've trained enough turkeys

Who never came through

You're my one last hope, so you'll have to do

Demigods have faced the odds and ended up a mockery

Don't believe the stories that you read on all the crockery

To be a true hero, kid, is a dying art

Like painting a masterpiece, it's a work of heart

It takes more than sinew

Comes down to what's in you

You have to continue to grow

[PHIL, spoken]

Now that's more like it!

[PHIL]

I'm down to one last shot, and my last high note

Before that blasted Underworld gets my goat

My dreams are on you, kid

Go make 'em come true

Climb that uphill slope

Keep pushing that envelope

You're my one last hope

And, kid, it's up to you

Yeah!