[Intro]

Dad feels handy

[Verse 1]

Fix the sink, re-mow the lawn

Those landscapers, they did it all wrong

Trim the hedges, paint the deck

Cleaning the gutters almost broke my neck

Build the wife a little birdhouse

Hey you kids, stop jumping on the couch

Driveway starting to get some cracks

Pour some concrete, there, now it's patched

Need myself a 20-pound sledge

To obliterate the neighbor's shed

Error error, ignore ignore

Let Dad rephrase that part of the song

Dad's not jealous of the neighbor's shed

In fact, he'll build his own instead

Apocalypse-proof and ten stories tall

With True Value it's possible

[Chorus]

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

You

[Verse 2]

All the tools to take over the world

Allow the server to rest assured

From vice grip pliers to neutralizers

Dad's prepared for all surprises

This is the store of my electric dreams

I now understand what living means

Dad is now reaching for ultimate power

Like the ultra flow head in the shower

Mom sure did appreciate that

But now she wants a Jacuzzi bath

Lucky for me, I know where to go

The land where the novice all turn pro

I'll show the neighbor how it's done

Electric mower, cut checkered lawn

Follow the orb to the glowing red sign

Let the knowledge absorb then YouTube is mine

[Chorus]

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

(You)

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

Oh True Value

You know I love you

Oh True Value

You know I love

You

[Outro]

We know what it takes

True Value