[Verse 1]

I don't like when people dictate over my happiness

'Bout six months now, with my friends fuck dapping it

Yeah, I'm still rapping, fuck, but I'm living so dapper

And I'm sober, it's whatever, niggas ain't never graspin' it

Niggas never could listen when you try to be better

No more givin' into vices, selling happy for pleasure

Wish I never grew up idolizing the cheddar

Love so many people but I'll never be better for 'em

I'm self-centered, thinking that it's all about me

That's a problem I could never wish away when I breathe

Leave my presence in the venue every time that we leave

Think I love it but I'm crying every night in my sheets

Then I bleed, self-harm scars, blood in the tee

Suicidal thoughts linger in the presence I bring

The only present that I think is me dead in the breeze

Summer sunlight beating down my head with the trees

[Verse 2]

I call my mother, I'm asking if she proud

I lied to her the other day, saying I was down

So she could say she love me or maybe I could frown

Or feel something other than right now

The liquor too strong, yeah, I relapsed

I don't give a fuck about me, tell 'em, “Run it back”

'Cause every single day I'm smiling, holding back an attack

Of panic 'cause my nerves is getting frantic in the chat

[Verse 3]

I would get it if you left

I don't fuck about me or a check

The money fucked me over, made me think I was the best

My ego got big, now I'm sitting here, depressed

Wanna kill myself, but I don't wanna hurt you next

I hate every word that comes with my breath

All I ever brought to this world was stress

Insecure, maybe that's my test

I'll never be better, so I ain't checkin' my texts

[Verse 4]

I got a bottle in one hand, my life in the other

If it was up to me, I'd throw it all away in the gutter

I know you care, but my heart sliced through like some butter

Feel like nobody understand what it's like to be underground

Not with my music but with my heart

When it all goes down, who's there with me in the dark?

Like I'm not sitting, suffering, dying with all the art

Like this arc don't suck, this shit is just getting hard

And harder