[Verse]

I was foldin' the dishes while drinkin' my sheets

My mama's a virgin, she walkin' my fish

One night in the morning, I was eating my soda

My dog is a cow 'cause he drinkin' a brick

I was braiding my bald spot while tying my sandal with candle

My girl started suckin' her dick

I don't like spaghetti while using confetti

'Cause the mayonnaise, it always get stuck in my wrist

If you kill me, I'm beating your ass

And I'm tellin' my dad I'm an orphan but that's what you get

I was takin' a shower from the side of the car

But it didn't have none so I'm takin' a shit

Blind people can't see, they just gotta eat seafood

But if you deaf then just listen to this

My mom couldn't have me so when she gave birth, she had an abortion when I was like six

They keep callin' me gay but I'm not

That's my boyfriend, he straight but he really attracted to men

If you bark like a dog, I'ma bark like a tree

'Cause I'm grabbin' a stick, I'ma shoot at your pit

My brother is weird, he was beatin' his meat

And I really seen him take his dick out his clit

[Hook]

I was smokin' the beer and drinkin' some weed

It's hot outside so I'm boutta freeze

I had a heart attack for dinner

I'm drivin' my car but I stopped 'cause the light turned green

I tripped over a buildin' in Florida Dakota 'cause the hippo kept walkin' on top of my screen

I'm inside of a Walmart while shoppin' at Target 'cause I really don't want no KFC

[Outro]

Well, uh, this is the end of the song

I don't know what to do now

I guess I'm just gonna talk shit like every other rapper

But I don't really rap a lot 'cause I don't like Christmas

Unless you present something to me like in class but I don't have any classes

A girl with class tried to tell me she was bored one day and I was like, "Why don't you just write on the whiteboard?"

'Cause she don't like to marker but I marked it one time when she said wanted to walk away from me

But I don't like meat either way 'cause I'm vegan but I do like when I give girls meat but they not vegan either

But every single time I try to date a pescatarian they pussy smell like fish and I don't like fishin' for shit I don't like to find unless you're like a leprechaun at the end of the rainbow

That means you on that gay shit

But this rain actually wondering when I rain I-

Nah, but like there's a lot of things going on

Like, sometimes I'll even drink juice 'cause Hawaiian Punch, you know what I mean?

And I don't wanna get beat up unless I beat my meat but other times

Like, I realized I can't trust anything in the world

Like, one day I was takin' a bath and I realized my shower cap but they don't even like capital letters

Well, one time I let her do things to me when I'm in the mail, but I'm a male so why would you try to give me your male-box?

That's that gay shit, but—

Aight, this is the end of the song but why would the end end in the beginning if it never started?

But you gotta finish the race—there's a race war and like I'm black and she's white

But you're white or wrong, it doesn't matter, it depends on what thong you're wearing on a Wednesday night