[Verse]

Yeah, what am I but a cry for help?

I don't care you like me, I don't really like myself

At times I've felt my mind could melt

Cause I get too hot-headed & I'm tempted to tie the belt

Might as well, the meds ain't workin

I can feel my fucking head veins bursting

I turn to the drink to suppress pain's burden

Certain that imma spend the next day hurtin

The best brain surgeon, couldn't fix the damage I've done

What have my bad habits become?

You wanna talk about stress? Yeah I manage a tonne

I'm wishing I knew a magician cause I just wanna vanish at once

Rapidly run from the thoughts in my head

Another night where I'm pouring a Teds as I watch a Ted Talk & it's four in the morning

Ignoring the yawning, I'll snore when I'm dead

& I'm bored of it, bored of regret

I'm torn by the torment, I'm sure that it's spread

I can sense that my friends have been caught in the dread

I should tell my girl how I feel more but instead I just hide it

So she gathers that I'm fine

But she'll know when my brain matter splatters on the blinds

That my mind's scattered, you can see it scattered in my rhymes

People will look back & say my rapping was a sign that I didn't know what to do

Got a lot to prove but can't move when I'm lost in booze

Even though he got lots of views, he never made it to the level that he wanted to

It's like I want to lose

I treat friends like imposters too & treat my missus like a prostitute

I'm a monster dude, obnoxious, rude, I boxed with doom

I think I'm due for a date with the doctor soon, yeah

It's like my world has shifted, my health is shit

It's self inflicted, if Sheldon's sick then Shell can fix it

Should of went & got help when I felt addicted, what a coward

I'm a slave to a substance & I've been making assumptions

Thinking my mates have been judging me lately

Maybe they ain't been, maybe I'm making it something it's not

But it's fucked up isn't it?

I'm much much quicker just to trust dumb idiots that I can get fucked up & just chug liquor with than my own missus

I'm a drugged fucked hypocrite

This is it, just a man in a rut, clutching my hand to a cup

& I feel like my plan to erupt's been abandoned & cut

& I'm just too stranded to bandage it up

(Tough luck) gotta think who's to blame

Who's the one who chooses to bruise his brain?

Who's the one who chooses to lose his aim?

Who's the one who uses the booze for pain?

It's all me

Yeah, I'm in charge of my own fate

I've thrown hate as I'm starving with no plate

Was so close to path I should go take

Then I slipped off as it started to rotate

My bones shake from my anxious thoughts

I can't walk from my anger, the anguish stalks

My anxiety's a gangster with fangs & claws

I just wanna kill it & shank its corpse, but I'm tanked of course

Not sure if I'm meant to resume, so again I just vent with a sensitive tune

As I think about ending it soon & I picture my family & friends as they enter the room