Xbox Kinect vs Virtual Boy

By Commander Jacob

On Half-Ass Rap Battles

Released on February 19, 2022

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[Verse 1: Xbox Kinect (Snakebite126)]

Yo, is this my competition? 'Cause if I were to predict it more

You’ll drop a couple lines, then they’ll bring in the 64!

Clear the tables! Oh, wait, you need one to be stable!

You can't hang with this player; you never made the damn cable

You should read your own warnings and just give it a rest, mate

It’s like the Oculus Quest came with ocular headaches

Two D-pads, but no direction. Boy, Nintendo didn't miss you

I can't let one diss continue before you were discontinuеd

Strap in for this: don’t make your players tape you down

Thе only way you’d be portable is now; I’m boutta take you out!

This chunky View Master with sticks for a stand had a Wario game and that shit didn’t Land

VR32 with 22 games; your whole library can fit in one hand

Slaying your nerd shit, making you nervous, Boy you're Virtually unplayable, worthless

There’s one difference amid you and me: I'm getting gamers shaking on purpose!


[Verse 2: Virtual Boy (Commander Jacob)]

I got your head spinning 360, 'cause when I flow

My comeback game is so unbelievable; call me Milo

You’ll be flying Solo in this dance for the best score (Woo!)

14 bars? You're so primitive, you can't Kinect Four

Without a Wiimote, you're what's tossed to the wall

Man, you should've been aborted when you were Project Natal (Woo!)

Don't talk libraries, yours was just a disaster

Tech demos and bland kiddie shit: Kinectimal Crackers

Your rapping and camera tracking ain’t matching with VB

'Cause I’m always in the zone, and you still can’t freaking see me

Sound the Red Alarm. I'm too fly, boy

Punchlines like Teleroboxer; smack a hack back to a black Eye Toy

Can't help seeing red when facing you, so hold it down

Wanna try to keep pushing buttons? Look who needs a controller now