[Verse 1]

Have you met my friend Henry?

Have you met my friend Sam?

One's long and lean, one's short and mean

Known quite well throughout this land

[Verse 2]

Have you heard my friend Henry?

Have you heard my friend Sam?

One's low and barks, one's quick and sharp

Known quite well throughout this land

[Verse 3]

I'd be dead if not for Henry

I'd be dead if not for Sam

They've spoke with those who've stood opposed

To the way I deal, the way I am

[Verse 4]

Grown to dislike my friend Henry

Grown to despisе my friend Sam

Too many times I've lost my mind

Fеlt them in my trembling hands