[Intro]

She reeled me in just like a fish

I was hooked on every wish

I was placed upon a dish

Served up like a meal

It left me feeling crap

She’s never coming back

[Verse 1]

I was glazed and pickled raw

Drunken mostly on the floor

I was trained to give my paw

Like a begging dog

I fell apart and cracked

She’s never coming back

[Chorus]

She must have been a nice girl once upon a time

And her father must have loved her

But I quickly discovered

That she must have been a nice girl before she lost her mind

I’m glad she’s never coming back

[Verse 2]

Where she’s gone to I don't care

Someone else can say her hair

Is looking great in real despair

I crumbled like a cake

The whole affair just stank

She’s never coming back

[Chorus]

She must have been a nice girl once upon a time

But I quickly discovered

That she looked no good in rubber

And she must have been a nice girl before she lost her mind

I’m glad she’s never coming back

Yeah, I'm glad she's never coming back

[Bridge]

Her underwear would always droop

She worked her way through all the group

Inside she was chicken soup

But drink made it all seem

Just like a lovely dream

She’s never coming back