The grass is always greener on my side

But has there ever been a tree like you?

Green like you

A plastic tree standing in the lung of a big bloodbath

I can read the news faster than you

You wanna know where our little friend went?

Struck by Siberian avalanche

Paralyzed left to die

It's a sad day

It’s one of these days when you don't wanna go outside

You don't even wanna see the rocket ship take off

Or the park

Or the people who go there

Or the fashion show in the park

A few minutes pass

I hear a brave raging lunatic

Ringing words of wisdom into the ears of a balding sociopath

And I smile

And it comes to mind that in a few years

We will all get together and laugh at this chicken-scratch

Down in December

Love grows on trees

And in the sewer

Joy and shattered leaves

Tornado in Brooklyn

Money in Manhattan

Helicopter to Jersey

Stop flirting with me

Dance to the rats

Dance to the rats

Sleep with the roaches

Dance to the rats

Up upon November

There’s a brand new sewer rat

Sleeping with the sleeping

Flushing in Flushing

Magic like a sunset in a parking lot

A big bad rocket ship takes off

From Brooklyn, New York to Flushing, Queens

Where a deadly visionary was hatched

About Nico I can read the news

You wanna know what she's up to?

Extending the upper limit of her vocalization range

For Lou and Jim and Jimi and Satan

Today I got tired of you screaming at me

And eternally stroking your ego

So I'll go off to play a Bushwick Antifolk show

For the bartender walls and weirdos

Run down Avenue A

Take the J train

And I realize I was right all along

I'm Cannonball Statman

On the J train

And you just wanna be a character in one of my songs

Down in December

Love grows on trees

And in the sewer

Joy and shattered leaves

Tornado in Brooklyn

Money in Manhattan

Helicopter to Jersey

Stop flirting with me

Dance to the rats

Dance to the rats

Sleep with the roaches

Dance to the rats

Up upon November

There's a brand new sewer rat

Sleeping with the sleeping

Flushing in Flushing

My favorite thing in the world to do is chase the muse

I chase it every day

Stop electricity cars firetrucks congress barfights dust mites and red birds in my pursuit of it

I'm losing my mind in the best possible way

'Cause I know I ain't never gonna catch it

Down in December

Love grows on trees

And in the sewer

Joy and shattered leaves

Tornado in Brooklyn

Money in Manhattan

Helicopter to Jersey

Stop flirting with me

Dance to the rats

Dance to the rats

Sleep with the roaches

Dance to the rats

Up upon November

There’s a brand new sewer rat

Sleeping with the sleeping

Flushing in Flushing