[Intro]

[Verse 1: BLACK "E"]

Can you feel the pain? I wear it on sleeve

Never show emotions, so niggas never believe

Me, "Who, Him?!", "The one who never smiles, can't tell if he's happy or sad?"

Yeah, me, same nigga who's got issues with dad

Let's run it back, back before the land of the Turks

Before I had my hand in some dirt

I'm breathing air for the first time

And man this stuff hurts

"Is he living or dying Doc?", "Don't soften the blow."

"Possible brain damage, no cranium bone."

That's the least of my probs; could it get any worse?

Fade to Motherland, Ghana, Africa

Parents' origin, birth. I'm ten months

And my belly is swoll, It's hot as a mother

But my body is cold. Cirrhosis of liver from this malaria shit

Over before it's started, my life is fading me quick

What's your summary of life? This is just my beginning

I have no footprints in sand, no trust of God is within me

[Hook: BLACK "E"]

I know God hates me

I can feel it in my bones

If you look in my eyes

You'll see my soul burning cold

Pain is my solace

I welcome Death like he's family

I'm losing the battle

No more will left inside of me

[Verse 2: BLACK "E"]

Let's move along, to grade number six

Cruelest people on earth

So called heart warming kids

I remember the racists, when I start thinking back

The kids weren't white, the motherfuckers were black

"Tar Baby", "Damn nigga, you're dark as the night", "I can't see you nigga"

"Open your eyes", 11 years old, how can deal with this shit?

Plus I'm a boy, I can't be showing feelings and shit

I'll hold it in, let it eat me alive

You can see the anger and hate, burning deep in my eyes

This is my tool, you can't get the best of me

Now I'm about to explode, they keep testing me

How do I control it and keep from going bezerk?

Does God even exist; does He know that I hurt?

Now I'm sixteen, I feel alone in this world

Once again, my heart's broken. I'm losing trust in these girls

Change my persona, got a new walk and some clothes

They're not women no more, I'm seeing bitches and hoes

Hating myself, ashamed of my color and roots

I'd seen the gun in the closet. I just want to take it

And shoot myself in the head. Parents' walk in on me dead

But I'm a coward. I didn't pursue it

In the tub with knives to my wrists, but I just couldn't do it

[Hook: BLACK "E"]

[Verse 3: BLACK "E"]

Now as a man, as I look back on my life

I blamed Him for my troubles, even hated Him twice

Hated God so much, I wanted to kill Him myself

I didn't believe in Heaven, I'll take my chances with Hell

Time to man up and look myself in the mirror

Yeah, back in '98, it couldn't be clearer

I was homeless, roaming the City of Duke

Had no money for clothes, begging people for food

I had a chest full of pride, can't stoop to that level

Yo', I can't let him win, I can't give in to the Devil

Flash seven years, I'm in the city of dreams

It took becoming a man to know what sacrifice means

For sixteen years, I've been watching the game

Seen a lot of cats sell their soul for fortune and fame

But God had a plan, I cheated death twice

What's money, power, and respect, with no claims to your life

I took back control and made peace with myself

Swallowed my pride and started asking for help

Mended fences with pops and put my focus in music

Without God, yo', ain't no way I could do this

That's my life summary, but the story's ongoing

My Redemption Song; all here for the showing