[Verse 1: Big Burn]

First off I'd like to introduce myself

Name’s Matt Murnan and I love killing brain cells

Just pass me a couple blunts and a brown bottle

And we'll get this party started full fucking throttle

Always had a knack for making people laugh

To bad I won't make any money off that

Cause I'm the polar opposite of living phat

I can barely afford to wipe my ass

Drowning in bullshit I need to catch my breath

Life’s a bitch and I’m gonna fuck her to death

I got a serious peter pan complex

And the last thing I practice is safe sex

Living a sheltered life I’ve never been overseas

No confidence and full of insecurities

Family always giving me the third degree

Cause I graduated and I don’t know what to be

Chorus 2x

Who the fuck is big burn? what's he about?

He’s so superficial when he opens his mouth

Well on this track ima spill the beans and rice

And give you an inside look at my life

[Verse 2: Big Burn]

Hey what's up chicky chicky chick chick

Bet the last thing your gonna do is suck this dick

See I’ve never had any fucking luck with the ladies

And these failed relationships are driving me crazy

Now you know my heart has been shattered more than once

Courteous of a couple dirty noxious cunts

Throw a backstabbing ex best friend in the mix

And ya got some sincere Shakespearean shit

It's always in the back of my fucking mind

Now my world's filtered through these jaded eyes

A truly forlorn individual but at least I look like Malcolm McDowell

Trust me as far as this song fucking goes

I'm not trying to elicit any pathos

I just needed some lyrical catharsis

After this I’m back on being the hardest

Chorus 2x

[Verse 3: Big Burn]

Sucking dick at life is what I fucking do best

And laying steaming hot carls on my own chest

Self deprecating humor is the only way I get by

Now just listen and you’ll find out why

Everyday a little bit I'm dying inside

Entrenched in this bullshit nine to five

I'll forever be resigned to the grind

Just sitting and watching the parade go by

Potential is a terrible thing to waste

A by-product of always playing it safe

Like wanting to prove to daddy that I'm not a fool

But I got degree at a bullshit school

And why should you give a fuck about my plight?

Another piece of shit in the bowels of life

And since we just rot in the ground when we die

Consider this song my fucking goodbye

Chorus 2x