(not finished yet, don't mind the unfinished lyrics after the i discovered something awful things)

(Intro: Spoken Word)

In 2020, I have done something that is bad, but like I still feel the same guilt to this day since I suddenly woke up in 2024

It's about a person in my past that I have treated very poorly, I'm just admitting this before I get famous and twitter tries to cancel me or some shit!

So here is the full context

From her, to tf-tyre, to many other dramas on the internet, to someone who impersonated me and started bullying a friend of mine

But I gotta talk about the most interesting part of my old self: that one person, the poorly treated one, get ready everyone

(Verse 1)

When I was 10 years old, I wasn't aware of what the fuck I was doing

There was this person once, trying to keep smilin' behind their pain in a certain way

Viewing the name, I had flashbacks of who this is

It's like their life was falling apart, crumbling away

I ignored their sufferances, I was a heartless kiddo on the internet, unaware

Now that it came back in my mind, can't imagine the despair

Why was I even bothering 'em? What was my problem? So glad I matured

I kept insulting them with stupid shit, once I return to these, I'm like "was that the past me? Is that what I see?"

The more I think about it, the more I fucking regret it

Many bans on that website, yet I still found my own ways

It was really obvious it was me though, once you go further in this song the plot even worse, hold up

I was low-key trying to forget the idea I existed that year

The past still haunts me with lots of fear

I lived enough to see the old me, but will I live til 35 to see the other old me?

(Instrumental bridge)

(Verse 2)

As the narrative goes on and on

I realized I wasn't the only issue in their damn life

I scrolled through their old socials once and found out something awful

Regret's feeling my body, that time was a phenomenon

Like dude, their family problems, that's where in my heart that it hit

She said she lived in "some sort of hell", the fact she couldn't move out of her grandmother's that day, oh it felt like it always was some sorta doomsday

There was a shit pile of garbage all over the dang floor there back in the old '22, do I feel quite guilty? yes for sure I do!

I was somehow not the reason for the chopped family ties, she was an angel to the lesser said, it's like I snatched off her fucking wings

This action of mine was disgraceful, when I told her "I'm glad you're gone", the deep thought of this archive of mine, makes me feel like that slowly will this shit detach my heart strings

Even worse, her momma tried to make a NFT company, with what? USING HER ALMIGHTY DEADNAME

I once tried to invade her server on Discord once, there was her girlfriend

Gladly I failed, but I didn't think soon has came her legacy's end

The obscure nights of my past, is not to discuss

There was groups on the website, some against her, some supportin' her

I was the leader, of the anti-her, felt like the French Mussolini, a pure dictator

Oh, the reason I got mad at Dicey? I just hacked a wiki page once

For context, she was a moderator, to this community, I was an absolutely harmful fandom traitor

Those Trevor Henderson images, stays to the head of the kids I forgot that could believe anything on the fucking globe

Felt bad remembering this goddamn episode

Pay attention, it only gets worse, the twisted it goes further, trust me

Wished I could travel back in time, show some awaited sympathy

Nobody of course believed in me, her self harm showed nearly no future destiny

(Instrumental bridge 2)

(Verse 3: XIBS)

In 2024, once again, back in November

Still didn't ring a bell or have a clue, wherever she went, forever?

I played a Minecraft map about her, why did I even call it "top 20 ways to kill Dicey"? This map felt like an abandoned diary

Then at this time, my soul was like "stop there buddy", I felt this shit throughout my damn veins, this ain't a joke

To this day, all that I have memory of, unfortutanely in my head it still remains

Then for some unknown reason, I must admit it for the love of fuck, what I'm gonna tell is CRAZY

On Discord, I shared the idea of apologizing to her after my undelightful attacks

To my friends, my cousin Liam and my friend Ramiro

For some reason, my 4 ideas were to:

One, she forgives me, two is that she doesn't, three is the first one but with a leading, new and pretty fresh friendship, fourth was getting too romantical, what the actual fuck?

They kept telling me I was insane, the actual words:

"I thought you changed" oh Oisin, how I failed you so terribly

"goodbye you obsessive freak!" the time I almost got left by Tundra, gladly she forgave me

Ramiro was targetting me, I'm glad she's done, I was unbearably romantical by the thought of Dicey for no reason, I wasn't no free bee...

My dear Liam told me things like "IMAGINE YOUR ENEMY COMES BACK TO YOU TO APOLOGIZE AND SAYS HE WANTS TO FUCK YOU"

I felt this profoundly, asked myself if I am meant to be livin'

To all I've hurt, this is transformation, I showed some proofs of maturity, changed fast enough from the damn month of November

(Instrumental bridge 3)

(Verse 4: XIBS)

Hey Dicey, if you hear this song, it is me, your old foe

I am Louis, I tried my best to move on but the thought of what I've done in your already bad life, I didn't see the hellfire and the darkness behind it

Mixed emotions, you shouldn't see how bad it was, it's been 5 years of course, I have changed a lot

Matured even more

If you're not here, it feels like I'm apologizing to a wall

But to this day, I STILL stand tall, hoping for the second time that I won't yet again FALL

I've done a lot, actions speak louder than words but I don't live next to you or anything, fuck am I supposed to do?

I know you're a true playa, put your hands in the air if you feel that

You were an artist, you were creative, you were passionate, you were young and inspired, and now, I think I fucked up your avenir, for the love of God!

I don't even have conscious of where you are in the moment, I feel boring

I know you moved on, but my brain got corrupted by the thought of this old little war between us, and our supporters from each side

I can say I sadly got back on the same shit

It wasn't lit, I admit

To be honest with you, hm? Honestly, I feel lots of empathy

I hope your mom got her brain fixed, I hope you no longer live in your grandma's rottin' house, I hope you got your imagination full of layers like an onion, hope it's back for real

I hope your life is better than any other time, I hope high school goes well for you, I send you my prayers even though I'm athiest, reminder to stay safe, even if you don't forgive me, I forgive myself, see?

(LAST BRIDGE)