This song is either going to be really funny or really offensive

Depending on the type of person you are

So, if you're the type of person who, for some reason, was born without a sense of humor

Don't say I didn't warn you

When I was born, my mom said, "You'll be the greatest black guy until you're dead

You'll be physically welden out

And instead of talking at a normal volume, you'll just shout

Everything, you won't know how to sing

You'll learn how to rap and beat box like a hip hop king

You'll have sex at a young age

By the time you're 14, you'll already have AIDS; financial aids"

And what do you know, when I grew up, I couldn't live up to my race

I learned how to sing, and I don't make people's ears ring

All of these signs point to one simple thing:

I'm a white guy, in a black guy's body

It may be ironic, and really dumb

But it's the only logical explanation for why I find afros unattractive

I'm a white guy, in a black guy's body

It definitely isn't the other way around

I could change my skin just like Michael Jackson

But then again, I don't wanna look like E.T. if he was dipped in bleach

My dad tried to make me good at sports

Even though I can barely last ten seconds on a court

He showed me music videos of hip hop artists that annoy me

If only he'd know that I don't like Soulja Boy

Because he doesn't just tell'em, but he also annoys them

I also find it necessary to add the word "tipping" to my vocabulary

And now I'm writing a song that makes fun of my own race

It's just a joke, please don't write angry notes

I'll just declare that you're wrong and I'm right

'Cause I'm a white guy, in a black guy's body

It may be ironic, and really dumb

But it's the only logical explanation for why I find long nails unattractive

I'm a white guy, in a black guy's body

It definitely isn't the other way around

I'm not as white as George Bush, or Ashton Kutch... er

But I'm definitely whiter than that guy with a mustache on the Pringles can

I'm a white guy in a black guy's body

I can't rap and I don't know karate

I'm not that big if you know what I mean

In fact, I'm the smallest you've ever seen

I'm only 5 foot 6

Reverse the numbers, you got a player for the Knicks

By the way, what's a "Knicks"?

I act stuck up and kind of gay

I'm always on time for work every day

With an eating disorder, I don't eat enough

And I'm not into athletic stuff

I'm always impatient and in a hurry with a foreign accent as bad as Tim Curry

Wait, is Tim Curry white? In that case, never mind

Why? Because I'm a white guy in black guy's body

It sounds pretty stupid and really wrong

But its the only logical explanation for why I wrote this freaking song

I'm a white guy in a black guy's body

Do you have any other reasoning for why I tip waiters and spell correct haters

And why I puked out a white guy's arm?

Blegh!

I just lost feeling in my right arm